she is living her life already without you. you see, she has already detached emotionally and you have not. i'm sorry for all your going through. it hurts a lot. until things are settled and she moves out your in limbo. it will hurt like heck when she leaves, but that is when at some point you'll start the healing process. keep coming here and reading the posts. try to remember as much as your heart is breaking your going to make it through this. we all are/have been there.

For your own sake and healing, you need to ask her to move out. You say she is the kindest woman but how kind is she if she is so callously moving on, going out, etc? My stbx tries to give me the same thing with "I'm trying to spare your feelings" crap--all the while he parades his ow all around town, in front of our friends, etc. This is sparing my feelings?? You need to tell her to leave. This will help you with starting to heal. It will not be easy, but if she really is a kind person, she will leave.

I am so sorry for your pain. You are not alone in walking this path. It is natural for it to hurt like hell,. It has only been a couple weeks and this is when the pain is so raw. Cry with us here, we feel your pain. Lean on us here, we will walk with you during this really hard first few weeks.. Journal your thoughts and make new friends. Please try to limit your contact as that makes the healing so hard.. Here is a manual that we put together for new ones here and I hope you find something in it that helps you gain some strength. I am sending a healing hug to you and Prayers of comfort and peace.. This is the time to try and control those things you can and that is you.. Eat a little , try and sleep a little , add a little exercise to release those positive endorphins and stay here with us. We have all been down this path in one way or another and we will help you.. It is now time to start stepping forward. and it won't be easy, but you can make it. we are and have and you will too in time.. Healing Hugs to you, Kimmee


http://dailystrength.org/c/Breakups-Divorce/forum/2816539-manual

Im doing the VA mandated 1 year separation with my stbx while still living under the same roof. He has a separate bedroom and works shift work so we dont have to see each other all the time. Were doing this to try and pay off some bills before taking on the expense of a 2nd household. Im trying to distance myself from him. I can relate to your comments about waiting for a call or waiting for them to return home. You can drive yourself mad thinking about what theyre doing. Its all very hard to deal with and I wish you the best. Find something that will take your mind off of her.

I am so sorry, I am living it right now.Divorce final Mar 17th, Our house is on the market, He has new GF,comes and goes as he pleases. It is so hard. Unfortunately, he got worse before it got any better. Hang in there, I made it thru,somehow I made it thru, something just clicked that I can't go back, he is not coming back, he is not going to change, Just try to "keep moving forward" and everyone who responded to my cries on DS have been GREAT! You need to talk, vent whatever, let me know. I'm here for ya!

Hi Meddle. All i can tell you is that you are at the right place. We all understand the pain you are feeling, believe me, we do. I found this site almost 4 months ago now and it has been a blessing. I met amazing people here. You will see, some days will be harder than others, those are the days where you get comfort and love from us. Some days will be better, those are the days that you will find yourself helping out others.

The journey you are beginning today will be the hardest roller coaster ride ever. There is one thing that people here all say: it will get better. They have been where we are and they know what they are talking about. I trust them. They know.

I am right there with you Meddle. Sending positive and healing thoughts your way my friend.

Mel