Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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cleigh 01/13/2017

The pain that we have suffered, collectively, on this site would fill all the oceans in the world if we could give pain physical attributes. But it is not the pain that defines us, but what we choose to do with that pain.

Set a goal today, be it small or large, but one that you can meet or exceed today. Your goals need to be success stories and make you feel good. Maybe your goal today could be this: every time I think of my ex or stbx, I will replace that thought with a favorite memory (that doesn't inolve your ex or stbx)... make a goal to move 10 minutes more, get up from you desk and take a mini-walk...Take your kids out for a walk..dance like no one is watching (Tom Petty's Running Down a Dream, great song to use)..write 3 positive affirmations to yourself...post something positive on this site...give 5 compliments to people today...

There are a thousand mini-goals every person can accomplish today. We have to take the negative in our life and start replacing it with positive. Do not let the negative behaviors of those in our lives drag us down, their negative behaviors will NOT define us.

My goal today: I am going to dance like nobody is watching (and hopefully my son will be at work so I don't scar him for life) :)

BrighterDaysAhead 01/13/2017

Well done cleigh. this is why i like your posts so much. You are on the bright side, which we all understand is tough to see at times. But we have to find the reason to see the good. Thanks for the positive post!! "You cannot live a positive life with a Negative mind". Great start to the day... Thank you cleigh. You are a really positive to this group!! :)

cleigh 01/13/2017

I had my share of days where I had a difficult time seeing the positive in my life. And sometimes it is hard to hear from someone who's life seems perfect that "everything will work out", "this is for the best", "you'll find someone better", etc. I know that I wanted to just scream at those people who had never suffered through the death of a marriage or an affair telling me those thing, as well-intentioned as they were. I find hearing from someone who has experienced the same type of trauma makes the advice more authentic.

monsolo 01/13/2017

Thank you for this post. I am very new to this. The news of my wife's secret was finally shared with me a month ago. It's been very hard, as you know. Each day, I wake up around 3 am at ground zero. I journal and feel my emotions and breath. It feels like I've been singled out. But I am not alone, this is very common and life has it's challenges. That's the rational part of my reaction. The emotion though is pain, enough for my part alone to fill the San Francisco bay. The pain is also like a wave. It comes, takes me over, but it does subside. Especially if I be with the pain and let it take me over, but with the trust that it will recede. I am trying to use this pain as a resource. As motivation to make good choices from here on out. To be positive. I cannot change the past. I can only attempt to control my experience today. Today, I choose to appreciate the people who have listened to me, I choose to be present with my kids, I choose to take each moment as it comes and to trust. Yes, I will slip, but I will also get back up.

STex 01/13/2017

It is more authentic. Give your pain a purpose today! I ask God to send me someone everyday going through this so that I can tell them I understand. Better days are on the horizon.

mirandac 01/13/2017

I like that STex, thats what i try to do just in
Different way. There are no easy Fixes thru
The grief and divorce process.

I try to help others and give them the Courage
to find their inner strength and resolve. Most of
Us are a lot stronger than we thought and will
Bounce back much stronger and we will heal
our hearts in our own time.

There is hope and there is light moving forward.
Its very hard to see when in darkness. HUGS

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