Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

13,009 Members
100,360 Posts
2 Online
Relationships & Sexuality
/ Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Seperation

Bevalina
Bevalina

My husband of 14 yr ..17yr together decided to text me 9 days ago to let me know he isn't happy and does not want to be at the family home anymore he is now at his mothers.


I can't make any sense of it we were not fighting and we're planning a holiday for next yr with my 13 yr old son.


It's hurting me so much that he is able to just get on as if nothing has happened while I'm a mess not knowing what I will do in the future, I have suffered with depression for the last 4 yrs and wracked up a lot of debt mainly making myself feel a bit better as he has put me down for years and I found out 4 yr ago he was texting another her woman telling her he would rather be with her than me ! Hence my depression. That is over and has been since before it really started but always in the back of my mind because at the time I was challenging him about her but he kept telling me it was all in my mind he was just a good friend and trying get to get me to be friends with her.


He keeps telling me everything is going to be ok but how can it possibly be I'm still in the family home at the moment with my daughter and my son but for how long I don't know and it's the not knowing that is dragging me down. I know I'm going to better off mind wise in the future without him but I'm coming up 51 and feel it's to late for me to be happy

GettingBetterEveryday
GettingBetterEveryday
I'm sorry you're going through this. You said that you know that you're better off without him. I think you're right. Just remember that , especially on those harder days. You deserve happiness and it's never too late for it.
Bevalina
Bevalina
Thank you and I know I will mentally at the moment I can't see through the fog, I feel sick and frustrated keep asking him why he just tells me we have nothing in common I find that disgusting. He didn't like my friends they eventually dwindled off didn't get on with many of my family even my 50th was his friends i feel I have no one but my kids and feel bad them having to cope with my crying I should be looking after them
GettingBetterEveryday
GettingBetterEveryday
Sounds like you've become very isolated. That's a horrible feeling. Find support! Come back to daily strength! You do not have to be alone in this...remember you need to care of yourself if you're going to be there for your kids!
tabatha
tabatha
Wow we have much in common I'm 50 in July no kids though I'm not sure what will happen to me meaning where will me and the two dogs live how will I afford to live ... I have an appt with a good lawyer that makes me feel better also talking on this site is very helpful... if you need to talk I'm here
kbbcoop77
kbbcoop77
He's a selfish jerk and a complete asshole. My ex wife pulled this same shit after 24 years together..wasn't happy, "never felt right", I heard the same lines of crap..anyways that was 3 years ago and if I survived that nightmare anyone can. I'm 180 degrees better off now without her and content with my new life. My kids stood by me and I have a great relationship with them, meanwhile she's with her affair partner she was cheating on me with in a shitty apartment and she gets to deal with her narcissist mother, 2 peas in a pod. When they dump that shit show on you it's best to cut them off 100% and slam the door. That was the only way I was able to heal. I don't even know the last time we communicated and don't really care..and I used to count the days and hours of no contact etc...you'll get through the grief, trust me.