Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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Ravenck 05/05/2017

So i lost a friendship yesterday. She wanted me to be there for her and constantly calling me selfish because im so wrapped up in my drama and self loathing. I know im being selfish right now, i know im still reeling from everything that has happened and hearing my soon to be exs voice in my head telling me how horrible i am. I just couldnt do it anymore, try to be everyones rock when im barely keeping it together.

Anisha 05/05/2017

Hi Ravenck
I'm much younger than you and I wasn't married or so but I believe i can understand how you feel right now.
I have un-friended a friend here on DS because I was very upset with her but now I feel I did something wrong even it felt right the moment I did it.
Now I feel sorry for what I did.

Dandelion 05/05/2017

Right now you need to be taking care of yourself.

There's a book "Extreme Self Care" and a gazillion others.

This "friend" sounds selfish and self centered, and I honestly wouldn't lose any sleep over someone who's so demanding and can't understand the need to take care of oneself and set impeccable boundaries if needed to do so.

Cowgirl3 05/05/2017

I agree! Don't want to get involved with someone who isn't understanding through a shit storm of emotions that happen with a divorce. I can totally relate. Although I am the person that filed for divorce (in the beginning stages of the divorce), I was the victim of emotional, verbal and mental abuse (married 36 years). These manipulators don't start out as abusers but little by little the control and manipulation creep in. Tried to leave in 2000, but I stayed for the kids. Anyway, hang in there. Pull strength from those who are consistently there for you.

mirandac 05/05/2017

During your divorce you find your true supporters will be lean.
Thats the wisdom of therapy, divorce Care groups and alanon.

Find only good healthy nuturing people to help and support
you. I stayed clear of negative, abusive or dysfunctional people.

I Like what Cowgirl said, my ex seemed okay For the first 18 years.
A Little bit controlling and some old Anger issues. Not real bad
though, we seemed very happy For the first 10 years or so.

Then the emotional intimacy Started to decline more and more. We
were still Sexual until the end but without the emotional Intimacy the
marriage was dying a long slow death and his behaviors were driving
My behaviors.

To have a healthy happy relationship both people should have Self love
onboard and both have good strong healthy boundaries In place, we
Did not have that and eventually all the old stuff played out and came
Into play, HUGS

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