Talk to a good divorce lawyer was my solution,

My lawyer had my back and my ex had his own
lawyer. He wanted us to do it ourselves And He
would be fair. i did Not trust him. Hugs

I understand and feel the pain and emotions you are going through. You are in a very difficult place. I was there 1 year ago. Trust in yourself, believe in your power and strength. Realize that you must go through the grieving process and this will take some time. Be patient with yourself. Be kind to yourself and realize your are doing the best you can....and that is good enough for today. There is a lot of good material on the internet. David Burns book ....Feeling Good and Fred Luskin's book Forgive for Good are good starting points. Try meditation and divorce support groups. May the power be with you!

I am sorry that you are going through this, I do understand how you feel and if our pain and regret would just go away so we can live a healthy happy life with no threats, no pain and just move on and be able to function just as the person that left has no problem doing. It takes time for people like us to move on because we put our hearts and soul into the relationship we are not balls that bounce back yet we feel like the kick ball being kicked around. Therapy does help and if you can't do that then find a support system with a friend or family . forgiving someone is not for that person but for you . I do not forgive my stbx for what he has done to me and our sons but I forgive myself for staying and I forgive myself for giving stbx another chance and millions of chances with me and out sons. It takes time and it will get better.

I think you have a good start by separating yourself from her. Continue to do what you are doing and maybe if you find some sort of activity to keep you occupied and meet friends, you will definitely feel stronger about yourself.

I also think finding a support group in your area will definitely help!

It is possible you are worrying about some things they may never happen. Look up divorce laws in your state. Alimony may not be part of your states law...and if it is, she may or may not meet the criteria. If you can no longer live this way, meet with a lawyer. Most will consult with you for free or for a small fee. Then you will know what will happen should you divorce and you can put some worries to rest.

Next address your mental health. Look into finding a support group. Many people find support at a local church that hosts Divorce Care classes. You can get a lot of information there.

Also, make yourself exercise. It does wonders for your health. Even if it's just walking. I joined a meetup group and went hiking with them on the weekends. It was a great way to get my mind off things and meet people who didn't know my EX, so they didn't ask about him. It was invigorating and the trails were challenging for me, I grew stronger each time I did them.

You can do this. Divorce is NOT a death sentence.

Hey estranged78,
Sorry to hear you are going thru this,
Are there some fun things you and your wife did while you were dating?
What was some of the cool things you guys did that led to falling in love?
Would counseling help? If her behavior is corrected by a counselor would you want to stay with her?
I have heard about marriage retreats that allow couples to reconnect and had great results. Some of the couples said it was their last hope and turned out to be a pleasant surprise.
You guys are in my prayers,
J