Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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Tmiller75 08/22/2016

OK SO I NEED SOME ADVICE I HEARD FROM MY LAWYER TODAY AND THEY HAVE NOW BEEN IN CONTACT WITH MY HUSBANDS LAWYER AND SHE SAID THAT THEY WERE SUPPOSE TO HAVE A MEETING TOMARROW AND TRY TO COME UP WITH A CUSTODY AGREEMENT BEFORE WE GO TO COURT SO HERES MY ? HOW MUCH MORE SHOULD I GIVE UP IVE ALREADY AGREED TO JOINT CUSTODY WITH HIM AS THE PRIMARY TO MY OLDEST AND ME AS THE PRIMARY TO MY YOUNGEST HE GETS SPRING BREAK DURNING ODD YEARS ME EVEN YEARS HE GETS THE WHOLE MONTH OF JUNE ME THE WHOLE MONTH OF JULY MY OLDEST LIVES OTHERWISE WITH HIM AND MY YOUNGEST WITH ME I GET THANKSGIVING IN EVEN YEARS HIM ODD YEARS I GET CHRISTMAS EVE AND HE GETS CHRISTMAS DAY 7 DAYS A PIECE I PUT THIS PLAN INTO PLACE BECAUSE IM MOVING BACK HOME TO BE NEAR MY FAMILY SINCE FOR THE LAST 16 YEARS ALL I HAVE HAD IS HIM MY KIDS AND HIS FAMILY PLEASE ANYONE WHO CAN HELP

jojored 08/22/2016

Wow, I say you've already given him so much. Is there a huge age gap between the two children, or some other special circumstance because I would think having the kids remain together is in their best interest, but IDK your circumstances. Are you moving very far away, as in will having the kids go back and forth between homes be a hassle?

Tmiller75 08/22/2016

Im moving froms ga to tn about 400 miles the age diffrence is 4 yrs and as far as them being together that is what i want but my oldest is old enough to say where she wants to be my youngest isnt my youngest dosent want to live with him my oldest is in high school and wants to finish school with her friends and i cant nlame her for that but i cant see punishing my youngest eaither am i wrong should i keep the girls together and just travel back and forth myself so they arent apart am i being selfish thats the last thing i want is for my girls to suffer any more than they already have

samantha717 08/22/2016

Do what you think is right. You are their mother. You know them better than any lawyers and probably even their own father (if he's anything like my stbx). If you lose, at least you will have the peace of mind of knowing that you tried to do what was best for them.

Tmiller75 08/22/2016

Thanks sam and as far as me knowing them best well lets just say this they were asleep when he left for work in the morning and eaither going to bed or already in bed when he got home in the evening and on the few days a month he was off he spent it whoreing around instead of with them so yea i would say i know them better then he ups and picks them up for visitation and keeps them hid wont allow me to see them if he dosent agree with where im staying or if i say something to make him mad and because were still legally married with no court order yet the law says he can do it

strongandsilent 08/22/2016

Are you really sure you need to move now? Can it wait for a bit while the kids get settled into their new normal? I don't know how I would have survived being so far from one of my kids all the time.... buf, you have to trust your gut

jojored 08/22/2016

Oh boy, a teen girl! I certainly understand her wanting to be with her friends in school. Just make sure she knows that the door is always open if she changes her mind and wants to move to where you will be. Keep talking to her, no matter how hard it might be or how she might resist. Will he even be home nights when he has her full time?

Tmiller75 08/22/2016

No he has turned the day to day of my girls care over to this woman he met on craigslist and im hearing that i shoukd be the one to give continue to give things up

Tmiller75 08/22/2016

Let me be clear here for 16 years i took care of him and both girls and one of my children was born extremly sick i was the primary caregiver and he cheats for 12 yrs then he leaves takes my kids moves in with this woman so i uproot my life and move witin 20 miles of him so that we can have a joint agreement but the only way that works is if he has the final sayso in otherword if he says i cant see the girls then i cant make him but yet i should just allow this to happen

Tmiller75 08/22/2016

As far as talking to my girls we r still very close we facetime evernight at least we do when he allows it but if i do or say anything he dosent like well then he has the final say of if my kids can talk to me or not

Tmiller75 08/22/2016

Im getting off here before i get anymore upset than i already am have a good night everone

samantha717 08/22/2016

Maybe you need a new lawyer. (((HUGS)))

strongandsilent 08/23/2016

How horrible. Sending you all my best vibes

jojored 08/23/2016

He's being a jerk if he's controlling when your girls can even talk to you over the phone. Maybe it would be better to take both girls with you to live near your family. There they'll have you, your family, and NOT a craigs list sitter / girlfriend, whatever she is. Your daughter needs a parent, not a guy called dad who is never around. How can he be a father if he's not even with them? Unless he's holding something over your head that you've done, I don't see why you wouldn't get custody. I realize your daughter wants to stay at her school, but will it be best for her development to be with him? This is a very heart breaking situation.

Tmiller75 08/23/2016

No he has nothing over me and at this point im trying to get both girls im just saying because of her age unless the judge seed a good reason he wont go against her

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