Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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debbie7730 07/07/2016

So after all the misery I have been through, I just found out that my ex has been reading my text messages. He pulls out the name of the guy that I have had a few dates with. Even on my phone, my date is just listed by his first name only and my ex texts me his last name. So I call him out on this issue and he tells me that he has a friend who "can hack into everything" and that they hacked into my messanging program. This makes me feel completely violated. I, of course, let my attorney know right away what has happened and he has assured me that what my ex did was not only not right, but it was not legal. Thus, if my ex fails to sign the divorce aggreement next week, my attorney will investigate the hacking charge and we'll file a police report. My ex, now of course, insists that he did not hack my accounts -- that I left my phone around unlocked, which is such BS. But here is what is really creepy -- he calls me up and says your phone password is XXXX. Change it. And then he hanges up. I feel completely violated and unsafe now. Proving the hacking charges will be hard, so I am not really sure what to do or how to proceed. All I know is that I now feel unsafe and six months after divorce, my ex is still unemployed, in the house, and is still saying he won't sign an settlement.

ClearDay1 07/07/2016

I ended a relationship with someone that violated my privacycand crossed boundaries because of his own insecurities, curiosity, whatever.

It's scary and a total violation. I won't tolerate it, and I'm angry FOR you right now.

I know your worried about appeasing this a-hole because of the settlement. He's using it to control you. But at this point I'd let him have it with both barrels and tell him to f off.

Thats a lot of nerve. What a insecure brat of a human being he is.

lonelywolf79 07/07/2016

Why are you still living with him? LEAVE... or get a court order for him to leave. ANYTHING he does should be used against him. legally if possible. I would change all my passwords if I were you. Put a password on your phone and make sure you keep everything under lock and key and as private as possible. If there is still an issue then you can now prove that he is hacking your accounts. Any conversation with him should be done through email (not texts) and kept for future evidence.

Sorry you are going through this. It is a horrible situation. I wish you luck on everything. Try to leave asap

trisha9054 07/07/2016

My phone shuts down and can only be used when I put in a code. Don't volunteer any information to your ex. Try to get everything in emails or text if that's the only way you can get him telling you he's hacking your phone. If he says anything to you answer back in a text. That should annoy him. If he calls let it go to voicemail.

jojored 07/07/2016

On a similar note, because I too have a stbx who just won't leave, mine denied reading my emails, even though I came into the office and found an email from one of my folders on the screen. The email is not really an issue, I've long since removed anything I didn't want him to see. But he lied about it, and there's no way to prove it, which is so infuriating. He's also been lying and making up statements about financial issues. I do have proof of some of those lies and his day is coming. The best day recently was when my lawyer had her first in person meeting with his, and mine reported back to me that his wants to settle quickly because stbx "doesn't f***ing understand" (quote from his lawyer) about the rules of divorce, plus he has been late paying the lawyer. Deadbeat clients not welcome! I've been riding that high for days now. I have to believe that eventually these deadbeats will tire of their bs moves.

suzelder 07/07/2016

Hi Debbie, I can relate found a piece of paper after my STBX moved out where he had written down all my e-mail passwords and T-Mobile password to check my e-mails and phone/text records. Changed all of them again...That's a controlling, insecure guy for you.... I am worried he put a program on my computer to check it remotely and don't know how to know...hopefully he's reading this right now-LOL-stand up for yourself and please be careful what you do with e-mails and texts until your divorce is final.

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