nope

I've wondered the same, I always wanted a 2nd child

especially since I lost my pregnancy with exS and I had been thinking then it was my last chance

I'm 48 now, it would be incredibly selfish of me to think of having another now even if there were a loving partner in my life

I've had to come to terms with that loss and reality awhile ago

comes up a little everytime I see a newborn though

(((hugs)))

At least you have one child!
My STBX turned into a piece of cr*p and threw me away at 39. We had no kids (he was selfish and sterile; didn't I pick a winner?!?!?). While it will make the divorce process easier--no fighting over custody, and I will be free to move back to my homeland whenever I want, I have missed out on the joys of motherhood.
No--I'm not too old yet... but I think a biological child--when I'm sufficiently past the D to be thinking of another partner or even single motherhood--might not be fair to the child, as a first-time mother. (I think it's different when someone already has children then has another later in life compared to first-time late in life.)
I'll probably consider adoption when I get my life sorted out post-D...

No you're not crazy. I was a fool to think my EX wanted me to fulfill my dreams just the same as I wanted for him. But he sabotaged everything I tried to do in order to make them happen. I'm glad I don't have him holding me back anymore.

If your maternal side needs expression, find an outlet for it. Lord knows that there are many places to express it. :)

I sometimes have that thought as well. But then I realize all the wonderful things that did happen during the period when I was with my ex. We did not have children, but many people and experiences came into our life in a way that they might not have had we not been a couple.

I feel cheated as well. I love children and wanted another one but not now. With everything that has happened I feel too vulnerable to bring another child into the world. My son is my life but I wish I could have given him a sibling.

I am blessed with the most amazing child ever. Sometimes I wonder how the heck I was so lucky to have him. He is my world,and in my eyes certainly more than i could have ever hoped for. Maybe my clock is just beginning to tick loudly and now that I have a new life I wonder what it would be like to do it allover again. Perhaps my feelings on this will fade, maybe they wont, maybe I should just view it as a blessing that I am in a place where I would even think about it. Time will tell.

It's the same for me. I'll be 35 in couple of weeks and don't have any children. I really thought I would have them with my ex. He knew I was worried about my age and I think that's part of the reason he left me, it was too much pressure and it freaked him out. Anyway, this break up is the hardest I've ever been through. I do think that is because as well as dealing with the heart break, I've also lost my dream of having a baby one day. In all my other break ups I could always look to the future but this time the future just looks empty and meaningless.

Hi nonameyet,

For what it's worth, I've had MANY female friends at your age meet someone and subsequently have healthy children. Your future is not as bleak as you may think it is at this moment.

Landon
H

I have sometimes wondered, too, about having had another child. I am 32, and have a 5 year old, and I also realize I am lucky to have the kid I do, and I'm glad he is healthy, smart, etc. Having a child highlighted the inherent differences between my EX and I... I felt that your life changes when you have kids, and he felt you find a way to add your child into your life without changing it. He is also part-time dad, so the parenting part of life doesn't even register as a hiccup in his life beyond the every other weekend he has with his son.
I think about things in my life I could've done had I not married him. But, at the same time, I was going to marry him regardless, so it wouldn't have changed anything. Some days I am glad I had the marriage I did, and some days I want to beat myself in the face for turning a blind eye as often as I did. It's all a matter of perspective, i think.

I also did not have a second child with my ex after seeing how he behaved with our daughter. I still want one... but who knows. My doctor 6 years ago told me "have them now or don't have them" due to a medical condition. I'm not sure I could have another even if I wanted to at this point.

I'm not mad at the ex about this though, I'm mad at myself. If I hadn't gotten involved with him and then stayed as long as I did, I could have found a decent guy that would be a good father. Instead I settled and I and my daughter paid for it.

when I LOOK BACK all i see is the floor collapsed behind me for as far back as i can see...so i have NO other choice but to move forward...
im with you my friend..you are an inspiration to me.