I have noticed a few posts on here that are about looking back and changing the past. What would you have changed about your ex? So on and so forth. What is the point? THe thing is that we all have to look forward in our lives. Who cares what happened in the past. We have to remember the past or we are damned to relive it but we can't dwell on what was or what wasn't. We all have to put our best foot forward, grab the bull by the horns, and say "I am not going to let one person have controll over my happiness and my destiny unless that person is me!"

All looking back does is make us feel sorry for ourselves. I have done the same things and I have now figured out that looking back is useless. The past, like a ghost, can haunt us and scare us from being what we really want to be.

The next time you think about looking back and dwelling on the negativity that you are left with from the divorce, think about what you have instead. You have a break and a fresh lease on life. You have the ability to make your life what you want it without someone else having input in your decisions. You have probably gotten out of a really bad relationship that was poisoning you and now you can rebuild your life from the ground up.

Yeah, this whole process sucks and grieving is natural...but you don't have to sit around and wonder on what could have been. Why not sit around and wonder about what will be instead.