Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
I have really been doing some thinking and soul searching lately.
I have gotten so tied up dealing with the drama, pain, and strife that involves my ex that I forget this IS NOT what life is supposed to be. It occurred to me this morning when thinking about my ex with his new gf, and started to feel that jealousy, that life with him, while full of drama it wasn't full of much joy. I have been so tied up in fixing and hurting and running and chasing ang trying to figure out what he feels and needs, that I haven't been having any fun. My life has become a joyless chore. His new gf won't find any either, in the beginning it might seem thrilling, but after time it just becomes a job you don't want.
I have been reading everyone's posts and I see it in all of us. We have forgotten that love is not meant to be a chore, it is not meant to be drudgery, it is not meant to make you heart sick, keep you awake at night with anxiety, make you feel bad about yourself.
These contortions we tie ourselves into trying to fix them, fix our relationships, are like a slot machine that will never pay out. We keep pulling the lever - each time hopeful , genuinely convinced, this is the time the machine will pay off. BUT IT WILL NEVER PAY OUT! It is designed to take our money AND keep us hooked on the hope of the payoff that might come. This is not what life is meant to be.
Just some deep thoughts over coffee this morning.
I have gotten so tied up dealing with the drama, pain, and strife that involves my ex that I forget this IS NOT what life is supposed to be. It occurred to me this morning when thinking about my ex with his new gf, and started to feel that jealousy, that life with him, while full of drama it wasn't full of much joy. I have been so tied up in fixing and hurting and running and chasing ang trying to figure out what he feels and needs, that I haven't been having any fun. My life has become a joyless chore. His new gf won't find any either, in the beginning it might seem thrilling, but after time it just becomes a job you don't want.
I have been reading everyone's posts and I see it in all of us. We have forgotten that love is not meant to be a chore, it is not meant to be drudgery, it is not meant to make you heart sick, keep you awake at night with anxiety, make you feel bad about yourself.
These contortions we tie ourselves into trying to fix them, fix our relationships, are like a slot machine that will never pay out. We keep pulling the lever - each time hopeful , genuinely convinced, this is the time the machine will pay off. BUT IT WILL NEVER PAY OUT! It is designed to take our money AND keep us hooked on the hope of the payoff that might come. This is not what life is meant to be.
Just some deep thoughts over coffee this morning.
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I so exhausted from pain in my back that started Sunday but was mild and almost gone till I took bath that night and think I twisted or did something to take it to excruciating...I am away for work in a different state so traveled Monday and worked today then called my boss to fyi her about fact I am falling apart and walking like elderly person! I did telemed and they called in prednisone and...
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Can't wait to burn my pumpkin spice candle! National Coffee Day is coming up on the 29th so I hope to score up on a free coffee.
they feed their own need to be happy and don't care to realize that happiness is transitory and comes from external
so they consume everyone else
life is a slot machine because odds are that you'll meet more self centered creep weeds than not
My life right now sucks, and with this and some minor Heath issues I choose to believe it is still amazing even if I don't feel it.
I am sorry you are here, sorry pain is your experience. But am sure you remember when it was not, a stolen kiss, a skipped heart beat or more. That if life. Know you can and will find that again.
Stay strong be brave and you will be fine.
Please try and concentrate on you and what makes you happy.
A bubble bath, a movie, book, walk, anything to think of anyone other than your ex. Also, all the good things, even if it is just the sun, birds, anything positive.
I wish you the best,
Heal before you jump into another relationship.