Sorry you are in so much pain. I am right there with you. I filed on Dec. 2nd and didn't WANT to but HAD to so I can get to a better place. I thought my husband was the love of my life but 12 years later....here we are. You did what is best for you and your children...don't lose sight of that. None of us are prepared for the emotions and excruciating pain that comes with separation and divorce and we have all had days where we needed help getting out of bed. Good for you to reach out. I am a strong, independent woman and I am constantly asking for help now, was very hard for me to do. As in my case, you will find strength and support in some of the most surprising places. Join an in-person support group and get a good therapist, most insurance plans cover that. Go do something that makes you happy today now....shopping, movie (comedy only), or ice cream but go with someone who is a positive influence you. Be strong!

I am sorry, it's never easy. I filed 6 weeks ago. She still won't admit to affair which I have proof of now. 3 different men now plus all the financial abuse and her failure to communicate or discuss anything with me, lead me to file 2 weeks after I found out she was cheating. I found out she had drained the bank accounts, charges up the line of credit and she even cashed in my bond! Left me no money, yet she lives in the house. She is not the woman I married and has changed so much in the last year, I don't recognize the person she is now. I am learning to not be afraid to ask for help. I have to force myself to do so, it's not in my nature to ask. Usually I'm the one who helps others,so this is strange for me. So I say seek all the advice and help you can get. There are people out there that can help you make the right choices. Help clear your head so to speak. Never make an emotional decision, step back take a deep breath and try to relax. This kind of helps me a little.

What an A* , I'm sorry you have to deal with his nonsense, it would be easier for you if he could act like an adult.
You deserve better than him, a million times over.

Filing for divorce seems like an annoying expense. Freedom has its costs!

Who says that the cheater is the one who must file? The won't if they are a cake eater.

Own this and get the process going. It's worth it!!

Good for you basnime. I am proud of you, and you are definitely doing the right thing, both for you and your children. Everyone will be better off for it. When that time comes for me, I'll be on here looking for support as well. You have everyone's support here.

The hardest decision of my life. Good news is hopefully he's too cheap to hire an attorney. I wanted our marriage to work. When I speak to my husband he's so sweet but then he turns into a monster later. I am afraid of what the divorce filing will do. He's so emotionally abusive.
MD thank you. I don't feel brave, I am so scared. Scared he will retaliate, scared he will now flaunt his new love in me and the kids face. He's cruel.

Congrats! I'm in the same boat - he wanted the divorce but I will end up filing because I have more to protect and he has no plans to do so.

Why don't they file? Mine was bold and brave enough to do first last and security, new furniture but not divorce?

This was a needed step for you to move forward. Good luck in the coming weeks. Remember, WE can do hard things. In my first divorce I filed as I knew he never would. ON my second unwanted divorce, he filed but never finished it. Since I didn't want it, and we had nothing to fight over I didn't fight on anything, besides, I couldn't afford an attorney and I was so stinkin depressed, I didn't care what happened.
Anyhoo, I was taken by surprise when I found out he never finalized the paperwork and left me hanging....again. Months later I found out by accident that it had never been sent to the courts, I crawled out of my darkness, contacted his attorney and made sure it got done. Stupid man, we would still be married if I hadn't fixed it, like most things in our marriage. It was finalized 1-15-15. What a loss and its been very hard moving on, but we are left with no choice.
Hang in there everyone, its tough, its hard, its heart breaking but you will make it through. May 2017 be a happier year for everyone here!!!

It seems tough during the "doing of it".

Afterwards? You wonder why the heck didn't I do this way sooner!?!

Good for you basnime! I am sure it was a very hard thing to do but you should feel proud of yourself that you had the strength and courage to do it! I will be in the same boat as you are too. My stbx is still living with us 4 months after he said he was leaving....wont try to make things better but wont get out either....wont even talk about anything so I cant even bring up divorce, mediation, etc. I will have to tell him I want a divorce and do the filing myself too even though he started all this bs in the first place. I don't understand this behavior either.

Even though it was hard, in a way you must feel a little relief that it is done. Keep your head up and feel proud of yourself!

Good for you to have the strength to do it. You are a strong person and will make it through to the end. This all sucks so much for all of us that we need to stick together. If you need anything then please be in touch. As some of my friends tell me as a way to support me: You got this.

Thank you!

Got courage to do the same after reading your post. Have gone through many different article. blog sources and social media profiles like http://twitter.com/bechara56 to look for the divorce lawyer to proceed with the divorce process.

Good for you! It's the first step in the right direction!