I quit smoking almost 5 years ago and I keep finding similarities in quiting smoking and quiting my stbx. If any of you have quit smoking you know that the cravings you get only last a few minutes and if you wait it out the craving goes away.

I drove home from vacation today from one end of California to the other. It's a terribly long and boring drive so I had the radio blaring for most of it. Some song I've heard hundreds of times came on and of course it was about love so I started to wonder about all those unanswered questions again and had this urge to call my stbx to ask a few of them. Fortunately I didn't have a cell signal and knew I wouldn't for at least another hour so I was forced to wait it out. We've talked a few times over the past few weeks and both times the conversation went just fine and I felt good afterward. But this wasn't to discuss anything we needed to discuss. This was a 'How can you be so in love one min and just not the next?' call. I know there is absolutely no point in those kinds of calls.

So what I found was, just like nicotine cravings, that urge to call fades after a few minutes and when it's gone you feel so relieved that you didn't act on the craving. After the urge had passed I was back to my normal thinking about how I wouldn't want this man back if he came crawling on his hands and knees. So when I get that urge next time I'll do what I did when I quit smoking. Find something else to distract myself for a bit until it's passed. Funny how the worst thing for you can be the hardest thing to quit.