to remind yourself how far you have come :-)

How long has ti been since you been away for him.

it depends, because I have read some past stuff when i was out of the emotional realm, and it sometimes helped me to see things from a clearer perspective, because during the emotional turmoil, I did not see clearly, like now. I did not read much of them for only a little bit was enough, because than I would get sad, and no I would not suggest it if you do still any emotional connection with him, or her in my case.

Obviously if you are still feeling it, no way, do not read them, for they can hurt, a lot, or throw them away. You also do not want to hurt your current relationship by you feelings resurfacing either. My ex did that, and it destroyed everything. She did not cheat, but she could not handle the the emotions either, and just disappeared.

I am sorry you had to feel that, maybe you should delete them all? What is your reason for hanging on to them?

Because you're human.

I'm starting to realize that all those emotions like fear, hurt and pain were not bad things. They were necessary. And maybe we need those reminders of the past to show us what we've gained from the experience and what we might need to work on yet.

Wow thank Charlie. I think i am going to have to start PMing my long comments to you Chuckles so you can just shorten them for me, and get to the point. LOL :P

yeah...I found something I wrote my ex husband a long time ago. i thought i got rid of eevrything but I sounded very remourseful at the time....it reminds me of everything I have overcome

Sandy, funny you just posted this, because coincidentall, a few minutes ago I deleted all my ex-boyfriend's texts from my phone. Just after reading your post, I also went and deleted all his emails too. Better to get rid of the temptation. I'm sorry though that you had that experience. I can understand why you went back and looked...it would be tempting. I think you will quickly recover and get back to your strong, independent feelings again soon though!

I just got reminded of how much it hurt that I could pour my heart out begging for an answer as to why he left me with no warning after six years and him not responding even once to me. What kind of person can do that? And one month later he's traveling with a new chic to Florida. And now he's moved in with her. What does that say about what we shared? I know that he was desperate for a place to live but... and in my heart I know I could never be with a man like this so it makes me wonder if he molded himself to suit me for a place to live? I don't know but I'm sick of being hurt and angry over what he did and him not caring at all.

know whats great though?

you dont have to experience those feelings with your ex anymore, those emails are evidence of how unhappy you used to be...and now, youre free from that

my sadness changed from remembering, to having compassion for what the old me went through and how grateful she didnt have to go through that anymore

(((hugs)))

I agree with Charliegirl...I have done the same thing and it helps to remind me where I was and where I am now. Use it as a good thing and don't give up the self worth you have worked to get back because of a glimpse into the past.
You could always print them out before you delete them and have a ceremonial burning...that could be really cleansing for you.
As with Metta, I believe you will recover quickly from this and feel even stronger about who you are. :)

Thanks guys. I know you are right. Thanks.

Sandy I am really sorry to hear that. That really, really sucks. My ex did something similar. She kissed me good night, happy, and next day gone. just disappeared out of the blue. I e-mailed her several times,. Took her a week to get back to me basically said her computer was broken, but it should be fixed next week. it never was, 2 weeks, 1 month, 2 months hardly, anything no explanation, just disappeared, did not tell me what happened, and i had to find out myself, and investigate, and she lied about her computer broken down, and everything. i finally had to end it, because I was stuck in this hellish limbo. She did not even have the guts to end it. She just ran away instead. There is more to the story, but yeah i can understand, I could never understand how people can just do that without explanation, nothing, nada. how? But obviously there are people like that, and it sucks. I can not speak for your ex, but mine had problems with empathy, and emotions, so basically went through emotional overload, and did not care how i was feeling only her self, and just ran away. Mind you just before that, we talked all the time she was not working or sleeping, or me sleeping all hours of the day none stop, playing game stalking etc, and more, but none stop. I even set up my sleep pattern according to when she worked, and was home , because she was wanted me to be there to greet her, and she was on swing shift. Than overnight boom, nothing, not indication, and did not know what happened, just gone.

Again i am sorry, and i am sorry people like us get stuck with people like that that have no regard, respect, or integrity for the other person. I could not ever do that to another person, and even breaking up with her I told her how she made me feel, and what she did was cruel, but i was really nice, and assertive about it, for I still very much cared for her, but told her this was not right, and I could not do this anymore if she was not going to talk tome. I said i obviously gave her plenty of chances, so she was coward to let me do the dirty deed instead. I felt sorry for her, and still coming to term with it, and how she treated me, and the real person she really was, with no empathy. Just happened to me by the way not to long ago.

So yes I am sorry, and that really does suck Sandy. :(