I personally wouldn't but some do as they dwell on past and all that's been done making it harder to move on.

What if deep down u dont wanna move on but u want to see change?

Welcome to my world. I don't wanna move on, but it's imperative that my wife tries on her end... to make us work. Been apart over a month now, her decision, she asked me to leave our home due to friction between me and her 16 yr old son, its just not the answer. All this was...was verbal argument between me and her son. This was his doing as well. My wife wanted me to do all the changing, focused on my negatives to avoid addressing hers, and she handled things as if I change, I do all the work in our marriage in a blended family w/ 4 kids, that will fix everything. I'm always to blame and I always need to fix. I'm also not allowed to get upset about things either. I better always be happy, no matter what just happened. She often told me how I feel, never validated my reality and never let me have a right to how I REALLY feel. And if she didn't like or agree w/ my ideas on things, it was not even worth hearing or trying or even acknowledging.

Samuel, i really think if you stopped trying To
force solutions and just focused on yourself, your
life might improve for you and Your children's
sake.

You can not fix or control someone else, she
Is her own person. She probably has issues
Too that need to be addressed. You can not
Do that for her either.

I see you as someone who loves his family
Unit and you know you have made mistakes.

Many times broken marriages broke for many
Different reasons and if only one person wants
to keep trying it does not work.

You need to accept your powerlessness and
Take care of yourself. Do you know how many
of Us tried and tried and tried some more, it takes
Two willing mature adults to make a marriage
Work. HUGS

Ok well 1 i hardley talk to my wife.
.she not dead set on divorce. So by me forcing something im not. I talk to her about my kids but every so often we will talk about us the past things we change in both of us. I was just asking

Well it takes two to make it work so if other person isn't willing to do work whats the point? If it's a new breakup sometimes some space is needed and maybe it's possible. But if other person isn't ready to work on it then you will just push them further by insisinsisting on dwelling on all that's wrong.

Samuel, i feel your pain i wanted to fix my
Marriage and my ex. Nothing i did worked
I needed to stop, he wanted out.

We started having these circular arguements
that Went no where. I could not understand
him And he could not understand me. It just
went Round and round. That was not how our
marriage Worked when it was fairly healthy,
We were then a team.

I don't think he wanted to hear me, he wanted
Out instead. You can not make someone stay
Even if you love them. Its very hard letting go.

I hope and pray for you it works out but constant
Pressure and pushing things is not helping your
Cause. It will only push her further away.

Sometimes people can work things out if there
Is enough love left and no betrayals. Trust and
Respect are not easy to regain if they were lost.

Many won't go there again, i don't think i would
Whats the purpose. A good Marriage is built on
all of Those things. HUGS