Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
Married 30 yrs and have been divorced 5 yrs. this week. Since my divorce I've had two 2 yr. relationships, with the last one ending a couple wks. ago, and I hate being out of a relationship. I realize the women in those relationships were not the "ONE", however the relationships kept me from being lonely, and allowed me to be active with another person.
Both women realized that I was not interested in marriage with them, therefore they ended the relationship. Had there not been so many red flags in these relationships I would have been receptive to a long term commitment, however I was realistic in knowing that the red flags were dealbreakers.
I really want to be with that special person and even grow old with them, however at this time I'm doubtful. I'm not giving up and I try to keep in mind that I need to be patient, but it hurts having to wait.
Do any of you feel this way and if so what do you do to keep from getting down?
Both women realized that I was not interested in marriage with them, therefore they ended the relationship. Had there not been so many red flags in these relationships I would have been receptive to a long term commitment, however I was realistic in knowing that the red flags were dealbreakers.
I really want to be with that special person and even grow old with them, however at this time I'm doubtful. I'm not giving up and I try to keep in mind that I need to be patient, but it hurts having to wait.
Do any of you feel this way and if so what do you do to keep from getting down?
i really have no choice because i don't see any women around that are my age and appeal to me in the least and i'm not about to play the geezer who chases younger women.
I don't know if I have ever been in that spot, yet, where I feel less complete or something because I'm not attached. I just...well, don't. I have friends, work, my son, hobbies. I have a life that would be lovely to be enhanced by another, but def don't need it to be fulfilled by another.
Not that you're doing this, but dwelling on being alone will make you feel lonely. Thinking a lot about any ONE negative thing will change your attitude. Look at those two women as learning curves; you said you ignored red flags, and now you know about them, so that's a good thing and something good to remember as you continue dating. The thing is, once you get a little older, and have a marriage under your belt, you are bound to come across women with similiar baggage, or just baggage in general. Not all women are looking to "end" with marriage, I assure you.
It's ok to miss relationships, but try not to get consumed by it: Big hugs!
I think you may miss the idea of relationships rather than the actual relationship. It doesn't sound like you should miss your last couple of relationships.
It really isn't so bad living alone. In fact I love it. I love being able to do whatever I want, whenever i want. I have friends, but I am not in a relationship and I am very OK with that. I love my own company and it does not get me down. If truth be told sometimes my cat is to much company.LOL