Your not stupid,because you did not call him..Why would you call someone who makes you feel small and unwanted ???

oh man i feel your pain, i did text my ex lastnite begging him to come over (i had a few drinks in me...) he said no and then text me to see if i was up at 2:30 am but i had turned my phone off. anyway today he said he had to come get some stuff and i kind of um seduced him into the bed, he looked at me and said this will never happen again and we are done, do you still want to do this, and my dumb ass did. then i cryed and he hugged me and said he'll always love me and that i am important to him because i'm the mother of his son blah blah blah and off he went. he's probably with his gf now...who know, either way i hate my pathetic self and now i feel worse. i wish i could tell you how not to want to contact him, just try to be strong :(

letting go is hard when you are left behind without much warning. it us very hard. Be strong and don't contact them, but be forgiving of yourself when you slip. i haven't contacted mine at all for months, but have written many letters that I have never sent, will never send, in a variety of tones.

I realize that my husband is a changed man, and whatever he actually was all those years, or pretended to be, he has shown that at the present time he is now a selfish lying ass that steals, lies, and commits adultery... with the lowest woman he could locate . When I look at who is is now, I realize that my loyalty and love would be completely misplaced... This is NOT who I can love an esteem.

I figure it will take a will for my poor confused and battered heart to catch up with my assessment.

We need to let the liars and cheats seek each other, so we decent ones can fid each other and live in peace...

misquelle i am sorry to hear about that..i don't know what'sharder: soothing words and then him leaving like your ex did or a plain, brutal no like I had to experience..Either way I guess we have to be strong..Body52 you are right about loving and wasting our feelings on changed persons.. you gave me a good idea..Writing always helps..i don't know why..Maybe it puts the idea in order, better than talking does..Maybe I'll write what i would want to tell him..However..being annoyed and anxious when i see him online has become kinda hard..I guess i won't sign in on mess anymore for a while..:-

Hold your head high,and hang tuff...You get what you ask for,time to ask for what you want to get...

Oh my gosh, i'm going through the same thing right now, i'm sitting here tonight thinking i want to call or catch my X on the net, because we did the whole break up get back together thing so many times, and like you said we would start talking on the net, kinda hash it out, and it was always my fault too, so i was always the one to say sorry, and take the blame, and it got so old, that every time i got back with him a little love was wiped out, and now nothing is left and here i am so dumb, thinking about his rotten ass. I do not think it is love, i think i get lonely, or bored, or i dont know what it is, but love is not one sided. why do we love and we dont even get loved back? dont call dont talk to him on the net, i'm trying so hard like you not to let myself become so small by his words, you know if you call thats what will happen, then you will get mad all over again, and repeat the whole cycle, its not healthy, go through this rough part and there will be a rainbow at the end for both of us! God Bless and good luck not calling!!

If he belittles you after you call then it was a bad idea to call. If he accepts you back but its still your fault it sounds like it will happen down the road again anyhow - thus still not a good idea to call.

Let him go - then maybe he will start to notice you gone and want to come back to you. Then you can accept him on your own terms. If he doesn't come back - well you've already decided to let him go.

Sweetie - you need to see a counselor to sort this through. Please do it and take care of yourself.
Lynne