Do you NEED this for your divorce case? If its an absolute yes, then it is possible. If its not necessary, don't waste the frustration, time and energy.

My ex was subpoena'd for his military records to show physical abuse, violence and alcoholism. It was only asked for in relation to the safety of my child.

If you need it..it's possible..just. Speak with your attorney first to understand why it's really needed... Most lawyers want to stir the pot to make more cash for themselves....

Namaste- great advice, as usual, my fellow New Yorker. (Well...I'm in NC now, but always in NY in my heart)

HUGS!

I hope I don't need to but he is saying that it's his word against mine as far as verbal abuse. I may need to establish he has a history of verbal issues. I am hoping it does not come to this and will only do so as a last resort. I have been in court before though and have seen the nastiness of attorneys.

Not being an attorney, I would be surprised if the files would be released for use in a divorce case as it's a civil law issue rather than criminal. If there is an accompanying criminal case dealing with the abuse then it may be possible depending on where you live. Here in California, I've never heard of that happening.

Hi Head: Let me just mention that you and your STBX debating over evidence of abuse for divorce---don't discuss any of this with him. Your strategy is personal and private and none of his business. Whether you go no fault (in which abuse won't matter) or whether you go with cause (in which cause you can claim abuse, adultery, all sorts of stuff)---that is between your attorney and YOU. It is not between you and your STBX.

Lips get closed when speaking to your STBX about the case. Otherwise you will leak everything you may potentially have on him and that's probably what he's trying to discovery. So if he starts talking to you, stuff a cupcake in your mouth so you don't discuss your case with him.

When records are subpoenaed, be they work records, they can be subpoenaed for a divorce. And the attorney subpoenas them with the power of the court. Your STBX's attorney may object. The Judge may agree/not agree for you to proceed to have those records.

If there is no problem, whatever records are received have to be shared with your STBX's attorney also. If the employer refuses to produce records (which I doubt), they can be compelled to have the person who is responsible to maintain the records appear in person with the records for your review and a deposition.

BUT keep in mind, YOU REALLY DON'T KNOW WHAT IS IN THE H.R. RECORDS FOR SURE. It may have been that he was talked to informally and none of it was put on the record and put in his file otherwise he might have been fired for sure. AGAIN, your attorney will be the best person to decide.

Thanks so much. I hope it never comes to this and don't think it will. I would hope that he is mature enough not to get nasty. At least we are not battling custody issues as we have no children together. He is just refusing to split assets 50/50 and thinks I'm being irrational. Yet he is choosing the divorce, not me. I have pleaded for him to try to work through it because I don't want to go through the pain of divorce. He refuses and won't consider counseling. He is a piece of work and has turned his back on everyone around him. I don't understand how someone can be so callous and point the finger at everybody else. He has turned his back on his grown kids and three small grandchildren. He refuses to speak to any of them and has no contact. His mother died several years ago and he has not had contact with his dad in over 20 yrs. Last weekend he tried to give his two 13 yr old cats to a no kill animal shelter. He now has them up for foster adoption. He even told me I can have the dogs. He has no friends anymore and submerges himself in work. I am so confused, and divorce is his only answer. He sees nothing wrong with his choices, but this is not normal for a human being. I am so confused.