Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
Hi
I am currently in a clinic for a 3 week treatment program for severe depression and anxiety. Three weeks ago my boyfriend broke up with me - we had been together for 7 years, 6 and a half of those years with him in active cocaine addiction. I supported him through all those years and through rehab last October, then as he was approaching 4 months clean he dropped the bombshell that he is breaking up with me, I must move back to my parents (his reasons - he doesn't know who he is, he needs to learn to live by himself etc. All of which I can understand.. but to end a 7 year relationship over?) Now we still talk and he has visited me in the clinic - my therapist has said that he doesn't want me to have any contact at all with him, that he will just pull me down.The problem is I still love him (despite all he has done to me) and I see him as my best friend. Everyone keeps saying to me "But would someone who is YOUR best friend treat you that way?", obviously I can't disagree with their logic.... But how do I cut off all contact when I still have these feelings?
Please help....
I am currently in a clinic for a 3 week treatment program for severe depression and anxiety. Three weeks ago my boyfriend broke up with me - we had been together for 7 years, 6 and a half of those years with him in active cocaine addiction. I supported him through all those years and through rehab last October, then as he was approaching 4 months clean he dropped the bombshell that he is breaking up with me, I must move back to my parents (his reasons - he doesn't know who he is, he needs to learn to live by himself etc. All of which I can understand.. but to end a 7 year relationship over?) Now we still talk and he has visited me in the clinic - my therapist has said that he doesn't want me to have any contact at all with him, that he will just pull me down.The problem is I still love him (despite all he has done to me) and I see him as my best friend. Everyone keeps saying to me "But would someone who is YOUR best friend treat you that way?", obviously I can't disagree with their logic.... But how do I cut off all contact when I still have these feelings?
Please help....
(((hugs)))
VZee - you didn't say but I take the breakup sent you to this clinic? That makes me so sad for you - just thinking how hurt and lost you must have felt. 7 years was a long time and I am sure you felt betrayed when he left you - your heart can't understand - it couldn't take it and that sent you to this clinic - You are in my thoughts - wishing you peace and serenity right now.
I was recently telling someone how we never know what things we can do or say to someone that can send them over the edge. I don't think this person meant to hurt you - I was in a relationship where the person was reckless - did continue to hurt me w/the same type of act even knowing that it was causing me lots of meltdowns - I was fortunate to wake up one day and end the vicious circle - but not everyone is as strong - some go to an extreme - If only ppl were more careful with how they treat others.
Don't put your care in the hands of people on an online board when you have licensed professionals there to help you.
Do not waste more time
stop contact is the most difficult step I had gone through but it is a must step
It is up to you to ale long or short
to make it tough or easy
choose the right option