Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
How do you make it another day? I am starting to wonder.
My wife moved me out of the house, our 2 year old 4 bedroom home, into a 2 bedroom apartment.
She did it while I was disabled from work due to a bad knee injury and unemployed. I was also suffering from a seasonal depression bout (still am) and low on self esteem due to the injury and resulting weight gain.
I lost my new home, a nice truck, a bunch of great neighbors I loved, all our married friends, 50% of my time with my kids, and my I thought loving and devoted companion of 10 years.
My knee may never allow me to resume my past career, making me start over, and my wife is already sleeping with another man. In fact he stays over at my old house 2x a week. Plus she travels with him.
I have a crappy car my parents gave me that could die at any moment, leaving me car less.
I have $600 in savings until I am broke for good.
Finally there is the guilt of knowing that the marriage ended because I was not good enough of a provider, or a husband for her. She has even said so, and a lot of what she has said is true.
LOL ok now im just starting to sound like a cry baby, but man thats a lot of stuff. So yeah it sucks to be me. But it sucks even more being me and trying to figure out how the hell I get passed all this crap and not go insane.
My wife moved me out of the house, our 2 year old 4 bedroom home, into a 2 bedroom apartment.
She did it while I was disabled from work due to a bad knee injury and unemployed. I was also suffering from a seasonal depression bout (still am) and low on self esteem due to the injury and resulting weight gain.
I lost my new home, a nice truck, a bunch of great neighbors I loved, all our married friends, 50% of my time with my kids, and my I thought loving and devoted companion of 10 years.
My knee may never allow me to resume my past career, making me start over, and my wife is already sleeping with another man. In fact he stays over at my old house 2x a week. Plus she travels with him.
I have a crappy car my parents gave me that could die at any moment, leaving me car less.
I have $600 in savings until I am broke for good.
Finally there is the guilt of knowing that the marriage ended because I was not good enough of a provider, or a husband for her. She has even said so, and a lot of what she has said is true.
LOL ok now im just starting to sound like a cry baby, but man thats a lot of stuff. So yeah it sucks to be me. But it sucks even more being me and trying to figure out how the hell I get passed all this crap and not go insane.
focus on you. dont focus on what "may" happen (ie. you have a car that may give out at any time). focus on this moment. just get thru this moment. focus on what you have right now- not what could be. reframe your energy to positive - its hard i know - and right now it sucks eggs - but the more energy you put into goals for yourself and living in the now instead of what was or what could be the easier it is going to get to a time when you dont have to live moment to moment anymore - you can livehour by hour and then half day by half day- etc.
good luck to you. you are definitely not alone.
I have tried to set some short term goals for now like: get a new job, find a new church, go for a walk every day.
But it gets hard to do anything because I am so tired from being sad and depressed and from not eating. (I have lost 30 pounds in a month).
Sometimes it just takes all your energy not to go down and Firebomb the house that you paid for as well.
I found that you just need to start looking at the things you have always been interested in but never had the time or the Ex never gave you time for.
Picture yourself metaphorically, as cream rising to the top or being knocked down and getting back up.