Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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ll47ll 07/18/2009

My X and I are on speaking terms again and the worst might be over for us. I have never stayed friends, or in contact, with x boyfriends in the past, always found it awkward. How do you stay friends or at least civil without the awkwardness? We went to VBS family night to watch the kids and sat at dinner together, but it was a little awkward despite no disagreements, no drama, no complaints.

deleted_user 07/18/2009

Then why the awkwardness? That sounds great! No argument, no complaints, great dinner. WOW! I say that is a great step. most people can't even talk to their EX. I think if you let things go the way they are going it will get less awkward and you will be joking and giggling again. My EX and i are the same. She(and our son) live with me as roomies, uhh her, not my son :P We get along great, watch TV, play video games(go go Mario Kart Wii), share the cooking responsibilities and parenting. It has taken 4yrs, to get to this point, but it got there. I think you two are on your way to being healthy and at least good for the kids. I have a strong belief that even though kids don't know what is going on, they KNOW what is "going on."

deleted_user 07/18/2009

I'm really good friends w 2 of my exes. with one of them, we cut contact for almost 4 yrs and only talked again bc a tragedy brought us together as friends, but that doesn't sound like ur case. With the other one... we remind ourselves that despite everything bad we'd ever done to each other, at the end of the day, I know he is a good person and wants the best for me, and I for him. Thats how we keep it cool and civil. We have this unspoken understanding to avoid certain topics. For the most part, things aren't awkward anymore, but i think that takes time. good luck!

ll47ll 07/19/2009

He has been friendly lately, one reason I suspect. But on my part, I just don't feel comfortable yet, maybe it will just take time.

deleted_user 07/19/2009

Don't worry about being friends. Being cordial should be just fine. The things we go through with divorce and splitting up the family makes a friendship very hard. When it comes down to it friends don't go through divorce only to be friends on the other end of it. Think about it sharing secrets and inner most feelings are things friends and spouses do. Do you really think you can both be comfortable doing any of that? Well, you shouldn't not anytime soon anyway. Give it time and you will find the niche in which your lives will find a comfortable intersection.

Several months ago my ex saw the look on my face when he told me I was his "best friend". Friends don't do what we've done to each other. Right now I'll settle for simply caring for one another while we travel on separate journeys.

deleted_user 07/19/2009

Be careful.

deleted_user 07/19/2009

you drink. Seriously, it helps. that and stay away from them as much as possible, especially while they are carrying out their affair.

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