Thats a good question with a good therapist
To help guide you. My marriage was dead and
That was hard to face and to cope with.

I needed Help outside of him, he was no longer
invested In us or making the marriage work. I did
not get Much real honesty. Watch their actions
they often Speak much louder than words.

Listen to your gut, mine was screeching in my
Ear, HUGS

For some of us, those who hang on way way too long, I think you have to hit your personal rock bottom before you bail. If you have poor self-esteem, you'll probably hang on too long. Others are smarter emotionally or hold themselves in higher regard and don't go all the way down. It's really going to depend on you. Like Miranda said, look at what he's doing. To me, it looks like he's not invested in the marriage. By his actions, would an outsider think he was a married guy? Do people see you two out as a couple? Do you go to parties together? Running errands? A walk together? Or do people see you guys doing things separately? If he's living basically as a single, I'd say that's what he wants. Especially since you've tried talking to him about this very thing.

Well to start therapy for yourself is always a good start, If you want the marriage to work then perhaps you can leave him a note or text him that the two of you need to go out to dinner to talk that way the conversation is in public and for the most part will be calm. If he keeps putting it off then you can leave to stay with someone for awhile until he is ready but staying in the same house and living as roommates and not a married couple will just make you feel worse. I wish you the best

Thank you guys for the help. I am definitely going to start going to therapy to hear myself say certain things I know I need to hear and to get another unbiased opinion. I know they say in marriages you have to grow together and this year I truly feel we are growing apart. It is beyond words painful but if something doesn't change I don't know how I can continue on it's affecting my mental health. I am ALWAYS putting him before me and that's not healthy.

Hey just recognizing that always putting the other person first is not healthy is a great start! I too had to say stuff out loud (to the marriage counselor) before I could 100% face issues head on. Good luck to you.

have an honest talk. the worst reason yet most common reason of breakup is misunderstanding. yes misunderstanding. so sit down with him and have a heart to heart talk to see what's bothers him and what he wants to happen and share with him what bothers u and what u want to happen. if he listens and want to wor it out then u both have a chance. if not, u need to get out of this relationship. it's a lost cause.