I want a divorce. I've wanted one for years. He is extremely lazy and just wants to live off of worker's comp payments and disability payments. Because he suddenly decided to stop caring about anything and everything except for pornography and World of Warcraft, we had to move in with my parents. We have an 8 year old son who is autistic, and he doesn't help with him at all. I had to BEG him to come to our son's birthday party last week, and on the way home he told me I "owe" him for that. I wakes up at 3pm and literally moves just 3 feet from our bed to his computer, and immediately gets on WoW. Our bedroom is the entire upstairs to my parents house (basically a finished attic), and he only comes down stairs once a day to go to the bathroom. He won't come down to eat, and gets mad when I don't bring his meals to him. He was like this before we moved in here a month ago. He doesn't shower, he's rude and abusive, and even though he's on the computer from 3pm until 6am, he doesn't bother with his online classes that he signed up for. Meanwhile, I go to school and try to take care of our son. We need a new car because ours is 18 years old and on it's last leg. He won't do anything to help out with anything at all. Basically, he's a lazy bum. He doesn't even leave the house except to go to his psych appointments twice a month, and he lies to the doctors that he's taking his meds and tells them that everything's fine.
We live in northeast Ohio, and his whole family is in St. Louis. His dad offered to come get him and take him back home, but he won't go. I want him GONE! How do I get him to leave??
I'm turning 30 in a few months, and I would like to have more children, but I will need fertility treatments. He won't be supportive when it's time for me to go through that, and he already is a non-existent parent as it is. I would like to be able to have the freedom to start dating (I got over the loss of my marriage several years ago, and now it's just a marriage in the legal sense). I want my own life. I want my own bed, without him in it. I want to be with someone who loves me, and that I love in return. My husband doesn't even speak more than a few words to me a day, he doesn't ask how my day was, and doesn't even know whether I've left the house or not. I could be gone all day long, and he would never know it. In fact, he has no idea where I've been today, yesterday, or any other day for the past I-don't-know how long. The only way he notices me is if I don't feed him. Sometimes I get lonely, so I ask him to come downstairs and watch a movie with me. He'll tell me he's almost done doing what he's doing on WoW, and that he'll be down in a minute. Hours go by and he completely forgets about me.
So obviously, my marriage sucks and has nothing to do with love. I gave up on loving him when I realized he would never love me in return.
How do I convince him to get the heck out? He isn't here because he loves me or our son, and his Worker's Compensation lawyer says he can have everything transferred over to whatever state he decides to move to. I can't leave while he stays here because my parents will never allow that, and I have no where else to go right now. He really is the one who needs to leave, but he's not budging! What can I do??
Please help! I'm miserable and want to start dating again!! I want to get on with my life, and leave him where he belongs- as a distant horrible nightmare. Any advice?