Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
I had to call the wife about some financial stuff today. I am not really happy about that. I didn't want to call her but I had to. It was an interesting conversation but speaking with her weakens me.
I proposed an idea to her today. I offered to come by the house for a day and help her work on a project. I said that I would pay for the materials but the key was we had to do the project together. She could set rules and boundries on stuff we talked about.
Just a slight background....The house that my wife and I lived in was built in 1858 and was in her family for a while. I am not living there and you guys know the whole story why so I won't go into that.
Anyway, my wife replied to that and said that she doesn't want to see me right now and we need to live our lives separate. She is not ready to try to work on things now. She doesn't want to see me because all we do is argue (which I don't think is true).
It is wierd because she isn't ruling out working out things but she keeps talking about living separate. She doesn't want to divorce yet but she isn't wanting to work on things. She said that I never did anything wrong, we are just different people and our personalities don't match. I told her that she must have loved me to marry me and she said that she thought that she could live with me but now she can't stand it.
My responce to her not saying if we could work on things or not was that I was going to be a trailer and be pulled around behind her for a long time. I told her that she needs to make up her mind and be honest with me.
She answered that by saying that she just doesn't know but she wants to live separate for a while.
This whole thing is so confusing and wierd.
I proposed an idea to her today. I offered to come by the house for a day and help her work on a project. I said that I would pay for the materials but the key was we had to do the project together. She could set rules and boundries on stuff we talked about.
Just a slight background....The house that my wife and I lived in was built in 1858 and was in her family for a while. I am not living there and you guys know the whole story why so I won't go into that.
Anyway, my wife replied to that and said that she doesn't want to see me right now and we need to live our lives separate. She is not ready to try to work on things now. She doesn't want to see me because all we do is argue (which I don't think is true).
It is wierd because she isn't ruling out working out things but she keeps talking about living separate. She doesn't want to divorce yet but she isn't wanting to work on things. She said that I never did anything wrong, we are just different people and our personalities don't match. I told her that she must have loved me to marry me and she said that she thought that she could live with me but now she can't stand it.
My responce to her not saying if we could work on things or not was that I was going to be a trailer and be pulled around behind her for a long time. I told her that she needs to make up her mind and be honest with me.
She answered that by saying that she just doesn't know but she wants to live separate for a while.
This whole thing is so confusing and wierd.
If she is unwilling to get help or work on the relationship with a professional...it speaks volumes. It really does. I think she's making a nonverbal statement about where she really stands in this relationship with her refusal to seek therapy. I know this isnt what you want to hear...and I know its heartbreaking. I think you need to walk away. Because she already has.
A marriage can only be saved when both parties are willing and committed 110% to doing the work to save it. Her commitment level? ZERO. Yours? 100%.
I've been there. I know. Its godawful. I'm so sorry if this feedback is painful. I wanted to be honest from my own experiences.