Breakups & Divorce Support Group
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I did have a date tonight with the girl that I had a date with last week. She is a great girl and she is really sweet. We cooked a nice dinner together and then watched a movie.
When I went to leave tonight I asked her for a kiss. She said that she isn't ready. I told her that was fine and she was smart to take this slow. I told her that she was definately worth waiting for!
We have been emailing and talking on the phone for a while, over a month. We have only had two dates in person though and we have future ones planned. I really do like this girl and I like the way she is so I am hoping that things will work out.
I was worried that I may have scared her tonight by asking for a kiss but when I got home she had sent me another email thanking me for the flowers and a wonderful evening. I had to breathe a sigh of relief there.
I am not trying to put pressure on myself and I know that I need to let nature take its course and if it will it will and if it won't it won't, but I can't help but hope for it to be a success.
How will I know when the time is right to ask for a kiss again? How can I tell when she is ready for that?
When I went to leave tonight I asked her for a kiss. She said that she isn't ready. I told her that was fine and she was smart to take this slow. I told her that she was definately worth waiting for!
We have been emailing and talking on the phone for a while, over a month. We have only had two dates in person though and we have future ones planned. I really do like this girl and I like the way she is so I am hoping that things will work out.
I was worried that I may have scared her tonight by asking for a kiss but when I got home she had sent me another email thanking me for the flowers and a wonderful evening. I had to breathe a sigh of relief there.
I am not trying to put pressure on myself and I know that I need to let nature take its course and if it will it will and if it won't it won't, but I can't help but hope for it to be a success.
How will I know when the time is right to ask for a kiss again? How can I tell when she is ready for that?
You shouldn't have to ask for a kiss, as has been said it's something that just happens. It just seems weird to me because kissing is not that big a deal. It's not like you asked her to have your children or anything. I would be wondering like, "Okay if she's not sexually attracted to me why is she going out with me in the first place?"
Honestly I would back off and stop calling, stop sending flowers, etc. You have had a couple dates now and I'm sure have been a perfect gentleman, she should know a lot about you by now and if she is interested she'll actually put some effort into it and start pursuing you. Why not? You deserve it. Don't ask her to kiss you, act like you don't give a damn whether or not she does and all of a sudden she will want to.
Women want to stalk and hunt their prey and feel like they caught a prize. If you're just tossing the meat out in front of them they're going to sniff it and walk back into the cave. Yeah I know I don't always follow this advice myself, but if I had I wouldn't have wound up with my STBX.
I envy you for getting out there and meeting someone special. I hope it works out.
However, I feel that flowers on the first date was a bit much. You need to pace yourself or you run the risk of overwhelming her.
As for the kiss...I would tend to think that she is up in the air about whether she is physically attracted to you. If I am attracted to a man on a date, I would not mind him kissing me...first date or otherwise. As for asking for a kiss...depends on the situation at hand if you were looking deeply into my eyes and so close that our lips were nearly touching, it could be totally HOT to ask for a kiss...in that kind of whispery sexy man voice. Otherwise, it would kind of feel awkward (morals or no, a kiss is not breaking any moral boundaries).
JMHO...~Nini
Just let it happen
I do agree with the conscensus of don't ask... you'll know when the time is right... then just go for it.
Wait eight dates to find out if the other person likes you enough for a commitment?
Shit.
Eight dates *IS* a commitment, where I'm from.
I'm with Frank on the eight dates is a commitment. Also if you have to ask then there probably isn't the chemistry.