Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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jojored 11/12/2016

Hi everyone, it's another bright and sunny fall day here where I live. I hope everyone can have a chance to get outside and enjoy the beautiful weather. Myself, I will be painting outside at the "dream (not) house", serving 4 hours there, then I'll come home and rake leaves. Don't tell my boys, but I do enjoy raking! Plus, it's hysterical to watch the cats playing in the leaves!

I was reading an online blog about divorcing the passive aggressive husband. The author pointed the reader to Facebook, where there is (or might be) a group devoted to passive aggressiveness. Although I have a FB account, I've really only been on it maybe three times since I created it, about 6 years ago. My concern is can others see what groups I belong to? Some of stbx's family are my "friends" and I certainly don't want them asking me questions, or getting into my business. I don't even know if stbx told them we are divorcing, and we're already 6 months into the legal proceedings (with not much progress, not suprisingly if you know anything about PA's). Any help would be appreciated. If you have tips about limiting other people's access to FB, that'd be great as well. My boys are not into FB so they can't provide assistance.

Thanks! Have a great day!

waybackjack 11/12/2016

Raking rocks! Excellent non-impactful physical exercise and can help ease anxiety.

SassyGrace 11/12/2016

Waybackjack, what? Seriously?

Jojored, I can't answer your question, because I don't use Facebook. IMO it's just a way for people to spy and gossip on one another.

Hopefully someone will log on that has better advice than raking rocks. Lol

Hugs to you!

By the way, don't worry about your passive aggressive ex. He is what he is and he needs to work on that himself. Just live your life for what makes you happy. We can't change others :)

lb7268 11/12/2016

FB is the CIA. Be very careful.

patti22 11/12/2016

I'm on FB about as much as you are. I don't think that it's hard to set up a different account through. (I think FB is deleting unused old ones anyway), why not set up a new account just for joining that page?

I do know that you can visit a FB page without signing into anything (I do that from time to time when looking because I like the pictures posted on the National Park FB pages)
https://www.facebook.com/GlacierNPS/

So before going to any of that work, I'd go hunt down the page and see if it's even worth the effort.

Googling for it, I found this quickly,
https://www.facebook.com/passiveaggressivehusband/
but the last post appears to be old, and this one looks more set up to sell books than anything else. There's probably more out there though...and I think there might be private groups that don't show up on google searches...maybe someone else will know more.

GingerbreadGirl 11/12/2016

On fb, you can limit what people see of your posts. You can do that in privacy settings. My advice tho, put those people on your "restricted" list so they can't see anything or unfriend them entirely. Use facebook as you would any friendship- only put out there what you want other people to see. Rule of thumb for me, if I wouldn't want to see it on a billboard in my hometown, I don't put it on social media. That being said, you can easily limit what others see in privacy settings. The user interface is pretty straightforward- just read the parts that explain each thing if you aren't sure. And when in doubt, don't post it.

jojored 11/12/2016

Thanks everyone. Patti I will set up a second account, that's a great idea. In fact I did have a bogus one when I set mine up, I forget why I did that. I think I'll have my nieces help me out with my real facebook account when I see them at christmas time. I really only want to look at pictures of family members and their kids. I might post a few non-descript photos of my boys, that's it. I don't enjoy any of the drama, especially from one niece who likes to bash everyone publicly. And people's politics? No thank you. And to see new photos every day of someone's kids? Too much!

Hey, to you leaf raking haters, it's not so bad - the leaves smell wonderful! Plus I get to spend some outdoor time with my 16 y.o.

jojored 11/12/2016

SassyGrace, I actually DO have to worry about the passive aggressive stbx. He's so far cost me nearly $20,000 in legal bills because he's dragging his feet with the divorce. He just wants to go to court, which is in May, because that's what his lawyer is telling him. Screw all the interim steps where you can mediate, negotiate, settle out of court. If we go to court, that'll easily run another $20,000. THAT's why I want to figure out better ways of approaching and dealing with him. This is my financial future that he's already destroyed (doing something else), and I have to protect myself and my boys or we will be living under a bridge.

waybackjack 11/13/2016

No, no, no Ms. SassyGrace, I don't mean raking rocks (as in big stones). I'm using "rocks" as a verb, meaning "is really cool." You know like, chocolate rocks .... or your fave singer rocks, etc. Was referring to raking leaves.

Sorry to mislead.

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