I cannot even imagine the pain and I am just so sorry.

I know you are in a tremendous amount of pain now and that it isn't going to go away overnight, but I wanted to share with you something that helped me.

Once I took the time to grieve the loss of the relationship, I read something (I wish I could remember the name of the book or author) that talked about finding peace after a breakup/divorce.

The author said that as hard and impossible as it seems, you have to just forgive, let go and move on. He has moved on and it is not fair that you sit in the background with all of this pain and anger. I know it is not going to be easy, but if you can find a way to remember the good times that you had but accept that you two were just not the right match (there is someone else out there for you).....be happy for him that he is moving on and let there be peace in your heart.

It isn't good for your child either to be exposed to any of this -I'm not sure what she is exposed to really, but I'm guessing that your rage is oozing over the top (believe me -I would be doing the same thing).

This life we have is so so short. I just got back from a funeral tonight and it puts things in to perspective....it is up to you how you want to live the rest of your life. Your ex has moved on and so should you. Yes, you will grieve and have pain -but it isn't worth letting him rob you of your soul.

I know you just wanted to vent -sorry for all the advice -I will be quiet now :)

I'm feeling way down tonight so if I am coming across the wrong way, please accept my apologies


(((hugs)))
stay strong and positive

Sorry you are going through this Pam. It is horrible what some people can do to justify their actions.
My stbx had his whore in our church even before I knew about her. The two of them then chased me out of a new church I attempted to go to and with the kids.
Hate to say it but you just have to sit back and be secure in the knowledge that 10 - 1 this will all come back on his head.

I don't think there is any amount of gold or a big enough diamond to turn a whore into an honest woman.

I'm sorry about that honey. Do your daughter and he have a good relationship?
If not, can you block him from your daughters facebook? I think there may even be a way of blocking his photos from showing on her site. This way you won't be tempted to look.

I would be completely livid also. you have every right to yell and scream about it.
many hugs

Thanks everyone for the encouragement & advice.. I really appreciate it. I posted this a little over a week (or more) ago & really have had time to calm down.. It was more his mother's comments & the church photo & his comment that really cut deep.. But.. it really all does not matter. One of the first responses to this really got me thinking again about detaching, which I have struggled so hard with. But I went back to reading & soul searching once again & believe the night I looked at those photos was the kick in the butt I needed. I am still searching for forgiveness for him but I prayed for him that night & wished him happiness.. it surprised me that I actually meant it. I cried a lot that night & I think it helped cleanse a bit more of the poison. I still can't say that I'm there yet but I can see the light now.. soooo close to being free from the hold I've let him maintain over my life.

On the issue of her facebook & him.. they do have a very good relationship & I am thankful for that. Regardless of my feelings, I wouldn't block him from her friend list & even the bitch MIL added her & I have to leave that be.. but I WILL be monitoring HER messages to my daughter as she has caused trouble in the past. My daughter is very open about everything that goes on so I know if bitch says anything out of line, my daughter would tell me anyways.
To everyone else going through stuff like this too.. I wish you peace (((hugs)))

Rest assured that we ALL get what we put out there and he WILL get his.... It's a universal law....

((((((((pam)))))))))

I can say whatever I want....it doesn't make it true.

Unless I take something that isn't mine....then say it's not stealing....now I'm HONEST, right?

Thanks Louie.. I agree with the laws of the universe.. :)
And yesssss, Patti.. that is how it works, isn't it? lol

Giving you supportive hugs just because...

Lynne

Thank you Lynne... it is very much appreciated.. (((hug)))

Late entry but Pam, vent whenever you want.