Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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pam96 02/10/2010

So.. I know I will get flack on this but I know 99% would have done the same thing in my position.. My daughter had been asking for her own facebook for awhile now because she wanted to play on farmville so last week, I set up an account for her. I knew full well that he would have access & add her as a friend & possible even his thing he's with.. I knew all of that.. & thought I'd be ok with it now after 2 years.. & in a way.,.. I am ok with it. BUT tonight, I went on her fb to check her farmville crops & saw he had added her & tagged her in photos..
I had to look.. I knew I shouldn't but of course.. I had to..
SO.. there are still photos on there that I took.. WTF??!! How can he do that??? Then there are photos of them camping in OUR tent that we camped in together.. Then & this was the kicker!!!! There is a photo of his thing on there standing in a church with HIS added caption "I had to make an honest woman out of her".. THAT PISSED ME OFF!!!!!!!!
HJE FUCKING CHEATED WITH THAT WHORE & HE IS MAKING WHOM AN HONEST WOMAN?? HOW THE FUCK CAN A CHEATING, LYING SCUMBAG WHO HAD AN AFFAIR WITH THIS BITCH EVEN USE THE TERM "HONEST"?????
I FEEL SICK TO MY STOMACH.. Need to calm down...
Breathing
Breathing..
This too shall pass..
Sorry.. had to get that out...

solongbye 02/10/2010

I love when the cheaters take it to church, it's as if they can justify it all because they went to church.
I think you should wait for the church roof to cave in on them.

deleted_user 02/10/2010

Sometimes you just have to get it out. It's horrible the pain and struggle we have to carry around after a horrible breakup. Some seem to get over things so quickly, but like you, I have yet to detach emotionally from my ex, and it's been a long time.

deleted_user 02/10/2010

Oh ya I have heard it all. Mine at least is getting married in some events center. I am sorry that you are dealing with this. Thank goodness mine feels that anything on the computer is beneath him, except PORN. Don't beat yourself up, but try not to look again.

deleted_user 02/10/2010

I am so sorry. I would be devastated if that happened to me. It doesn't matter if it's a month, a year or 10 years. It still stings.
Just remember you are better off without him. And block him from her facebook!

pam96 02/10/2010

I am on a constant mission to detach emotionally.. I pray every night to find forgiveness & move on & I feel I'm right there.. I really am.. But fuck It still pisses me off that they go on like they are upstanding people with nothing tainting their relationship.. & everyone, including his drunk, bitch of a mother commenting on what an adorable happy couple they are.. There is another photo that he has taken from what looks like a crouched position, looking up at her & he commented "What do we see there?".. I can't see anything but I, of course, look for a ring..
Marry him, you fucking bitch & see what it's like in 10 year!!
Sorry again.. sigh...

deleted_user 02/10/2010

He's using this to sidestep his own guilt and make him feel better about himself. Strange way to try to hide and/or justify his actions.
That's like... messed up. Just my take.

My ex just took the direct route (blame shift) and told me I had it coming.

You know the truth, Pam.

deleted_user 02/10/2010

Jerk, creep, A$$-you know, if you have camping stuff, you probably have a shovel. . . just saying.

pam96 02/10/2010

Oh he blamed me for everything right from the start... "I left because you were controlling".. Bullshit!! I spent months in therapy for that one cause I was so confused.. I wanted to change it if it were true but guess what? I wasn't controlling anything in our relationship. The only thing I even attempted to control was keeping the house clean. I became obsessive with cleaning but in hindsight, I think it was because it was the only thing I could control..
I so wish I could do the procedure they did in the movie "Eternal sunshine of the Spotless Mind".. except I wouldn't want to lose my daughter..

pam96 02/10/2010

Ha ha.. I have a flashlight too, Alone.. thank you.. you made me laugh. :)

hurtinandhealin2560 02/10/2010

My ex and his skank ho/now wife also tried to find a church to go to.

They couldn't go to the Catholic church where they live--they said it was too strict.

Well, DUH! Most churches do frown on cheaters bringing their lovers to church. It's like the Ten Commandments don't exist for them.

I love how the cheaters think going to church will fix everything.

Vent away--it is so frustrating.

hurtinandhealin2560 02/10/2010

". . .mother commenting on what an adorable happy couple they are.."

My ex mother in law said something very similar. She told my ex sister in law, "S___ is so happy now."

I told my ex sil to ask her, "Yes, and at whose expense is he so happy?"

They just don't get it.

deleted_user 02/10/2010

That really sucks. Im so sorry you had to see it. From my perspective I refuse to let my kids have email accounts, facebook or anything til they are 16 (not sure how old yours is). I just think the kids are way into the internet stuff and too young to be able to handle it. the interconnected stuff really sucks. I am truly sorry you had to see all his stuff. *hugs*

pam96 02/10/2010

I agree on the age limitations & mine is only 10 but has had email since we split up since his family are all in South Africa & she is with me 90% of the time.. but I am in control of her account & FB & have the password to monitor everything. I want her to be comfortable with internet & doing all the computer stuff that I struggled with but she definitely has restrictions.
As for them going to church.. he has never actually gone to church. I have no idea about her but he has never had use for it.. The church photo was on a summer vacation they took so I have no idea what possesssed them to go into a church.

deleted_user 02/18/2010

Ugh Facebook is another thing we have to deal with. Pictures of my ex with his new girl, it makes me sick.

deleted_user 02/18/2010

Pssssssst Facebook is EVIL.

Delete your profile.

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