I had a break up in 2006 w a guy I was with 10 years. Believe me I know your pain. All I can say to you is slowly it gets better. Your best options are to cut all ties and keep busy. Cry at home or at lunch at work. I cried everyday. Idk how I made it through work or even life. I did see a therapist and that helped. Now I look back and i can't imagine my life w him in it. I'm in a better healthier relationship w a guy I love more than I ever thought I could. Good luck. U will heal

I agree with Diane22. It is best to cut all ties. Even if that means telling mutual friends upfront that you do not want or need to hear anything he is doing. I have had heartbreak that hurt so bad I didn't think I would make it to the kitchen to force food and water. My body hurt from the heartache of wondering where he was or what he was doing. If it is really over then let it be over because you will truly look back and think that he was not right for you. You may get back together several times in hopes of getting it right, but it is best to truly reflect on what you want out of your future and let him go right now if you see that the future with him is going to be constant heartache. It does get better. You can not see that right now but it does. You wake up one day and you find it just doesn't hurt quite as much as yesterday and so on. Then you will find yourself getting dressed up to impress someone else.

I had a similar experience. We were together for about that long, broke up, but remained constants in each other's lives. Our friendship and values were just too similar to remove one another. We were young, but old for our age, you know? In those years after our break-up neither of us ever really moved on. We were still caught up in the heart ache, analyzing our relationship, and hoping our future might work itself out. After a few casual relationships I entered into another serious relationship that took me by complete surprise. It was during this time that I found what I didnt have in my previous relationship. He showed me that I was lovable, worth it, we laughed a ton, and boosted my confidence and self worth; all things that my ex had not done. While I was in this new relationship I was still stuck on my ex tho. I hadn't forgiven myself for my faults or insufficiencies. I kept thinking I could have done something to save our relationship. If he could only see who I really was. If he could fall in love with me again everything would be fine because love would persevere. Wrong. It was one-sided. I would be compromising almost my entire being to be with him. We started dating at 18. We went through a lot of our changing phases together, but ultimately he was not open to evolve at the same pace/resisted change and we fell apart. I also was learning a lot about myself. Having him in my life never let the wounds heal. It never let me forgive myself for my contributions to the dysfunction or feel self-worth as a partner. It came to a head a couple of years later. It was getting heart broken ALL over again. All those negative feelings of self worth and the feeling of not being understood or appreciated for who I really was came rushing back. That knife that had always been stuck in my heart got twisted and shoved even further. I began doing yoga and meditating and suddenly I felt freed of him. I realized that the new guy I was with had given me what I needed and truly wanted out of a relationship. That I couldnt keep blaming myself for a relationship that died in hopes that if "we made it" one day that blame would be forgiven. I cut off all contact with him for good this time, no "Friends", and for the first time in my life felt free. I didnt think about him every day wondering what he was doing, feeling, if he had found someone, if he thought about me, beating myself up for not being good enough, having low self worth because I wasn't the one with him…. It wasn't meant to be forever. It was meant to serve as a lesson for me to make it right for the guy I choose to spend the rest of my life with. It is hard to see it now, but if I can say that you will get through it, you will get through this. Focus on your strengths and what defines you. Do what you love everyday and spend time with friends or family. Make new friends. Don't feel like you need to enter into another relationship to make the hurt go away. When you do find someone else you will have even more to offer. Take this time to let yourself grow and heal from this relationship. Love yourself everyday and know that you are worth it. Im sorry for your heartache right now. Just know that it hurts now so that you can be truly rewarded in the future. My thoughts are with you.

My heart goes out to you and I just want to encourage you that things can get better and you can heal from this emotional hurt you are currently going through. Give yourself time to heal and don't be hard on yourself. Take each day at a time and find things to do that you enjoy to help take your mind of him. You are worthy of true love, so please don't settle for less. Sending you hugs and a prayer.

TIme is a healer and we all need that to work through our feelings. You would not be human if you didn't so go easy on yourself. Everyone varies on the time line and I heard someone say if it is 2 years past (divorce, death of spouse) and you are still struggling go for some help. Otherwise the first year is going to be sad.
When someone breaks up and they get back together, the odds they will break up again, I think I heard, is about 90%. So hope you heal from this and find a really nice guy next time that thinks the world of you!!