Breakups & Divorce Support Group

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Does anyone know ?

ImAMess
ImAMess

I am curious if anyone is aware of any research or information...I seem to observe that many couples experience difficulty/separation/divorce somewhere in the 8-10 year range of their marriage a lot of time. I'm just wondering if there is some solid information out there on this. This is the case for me and I personally know many couples that seem to experience this same time dynamic. Just curious is all... 

lb7268
lb7268
Yep we separated at the ten year mark. She waited until that point so she could collect Social Security based on my income and years of working.
ifinallygetit
ifinallygetit
Did a little research on this issue because I am as curious as you. Actually the divorce rate goes up the longer you are married. The greatest percentage of divorces happen at 20 years which honestly baffles me, I figured that if you made it that far, you were good. I made it to 17 years of marriage. I know there are many people are here who are facing divorce after 20 plus years of marriage. Either way, whether you are married months or years, divorce sucks (especially if you are the one who didn't want it)
11Christmases
11Christmases
In people around me, I have noticed divorce rates seem to spike when the oldest kid reaches 11 or 12. My theory is that this is when the mom gets more relaxed about letting the kids stay home alone...hence not needing the other partner there or having to pay for a sitter or daycare. Then being a single parent becomes financially feasible. Personally, I contemplated divorce for almost 4 years before pulling the trigger.
jojored
jojored
Wow, that may be a pattern. My oldest was 11 when those divorce thoughts started in earnest in my head, youngest was 9 in 4th grade. I decided to stick it out till they were out of high school, but I couldn't wait that long. I filed when the youngest was finishing in 10th grade, the oldest finishing 12th. It was a sucky 7 years. I was married nearly 30 years total. Blech.
ImAMess
ImAMess
I just think it's an interesting dynamic. Just wondering what it is about that time frame. My spouse and I have no children and it isn't a child factor..
jojored
jojored
The majority of people in my divorce support group were married 20 years or longer. The facilitator said that this is the fastest growing segment of the divorce population.
ImAMess
ImAMess
Hmmm... so relationships/marriages that happened in the 80,s or 90's... interesting. Just wonder sometimes what he changed so much in making a relationship last.? Self centered thinking ? Generalized unhappiness ? I don't know....
Cora_Belle
Cora_Belle
It's called the "7 year itch".

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_seven-year_itch

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jennifer-nagy/the-sevenyear-itch-fact-o_b_2443171.html
Gutted
Gutted
I sometimes think humans were designed for serial monogamy.