I , for one, wish I had one of those bulldog attorneys, as I was married for 19 years, and got a pittance in child support, and no alimony, because we did it ourselves. When you are in the throes of pain, it is not a good time to be making life time decisions, and now that I am healed, I could really use some of the money, that he spends on drinking, and wooing his next wife, a young girl from the Philippines, who he plans to marry. I can't go back, but I would love to have had one of those doing what was right for me, and my child. Kimmee

Heave - I'm a divorce lawyer and I agree with you. Anyone ethical is going to try hard to settle the case. I can't tell you how many times I've gone over the 'yes, you will win at trial, but is it worth the fees" lecture with clients. Or, the "yes the car is worth more but here is what it will cost to fight that."

I'm glad you started off by saying "some attorneys" because I'm not like that nor are my friends.

FYI - Just got the largest sanction order against the other side in California because she insisted on taking unreasonable positions to trial.


Lynne

Let me clear something up. I have a lot of friends that are attorneys. Some are defense attorneys and some are commonwealth attorneys. I even have a few friends that do civil law. None of my friends are ambulance chasers and the ones I know are VERY moral people. The defense attorneys that I know do not try to get their clients off on stupid technicalities if they have done horrible things, they look for ways to help their client ethically. I know one attorney that makes plans for his clients to do (like drug addicts he sends to treatments etc).

I have no respect for the attorneys that come onto TV and do the law suit advertisements. I hate the attorneys that show up smelling the ability to make serious money for themselves.

I HIGHLY RESPECT attorneys that ethically represent their clients and seek to help the lives of their clients.

Heave you are right.

I went threw something similar where I had to choose to fight for xxxx amount of money that could cost xxxx to get. In the end I let it be because the lawyer would have gotten everything I won fighting it.

Me and my ex agreed on most everything and it and we told the lawyers this is what we want, go with it. The lawyers both did what we asked, didnt try pushing us that She could get this or I could get that etc. It was a good experience with them.

There are some very good lawyers out there and there are some terrible ones who think nothing other than how much they can make.

Kudos to the good ones and especially the good lawyers around here.

I had a good Attorney. She did what needed to be done and like Lynne said, she presented the reality of my situation from the start. She made it as easy as possible on me.

Unfortunately sometimes people don't listen to reason, and then we get put in a position where we have to fight with our attorney.

I think attorneys are like everyone else. Most are honest and hard working, it's the few who do take advantage that give the rest a bad name.

I'm getting screwed by lawyers cuz of the stbx.He wanted to do it WITHOUT lawyers as long as it went his way.I AND my lawyer keep catching stbx in lies.Stbx feels I should get nothing at all(I'm the one who left from abuse).Stbx has dragged out this divorce to punish me by spending absorbadant amounts of money...I've not been given a chance.I feel there are things my lawyer could have done different to end this and I'm paying dearly finacially and emotionally.It still is cheaper at this point to pay my lawyer than pay the almost 200k that stbx is asking...aaarrrrrggggg!!!!!

I had (have) an amazing attorney. He's been really good to me and I cannot imagine trying to go through this process without an attorney. My x would have left me (and his children) with nothing...happily. He didn't even charge me for every phone call or meeting that we had in the beginning...just the major ones...like when we were getting ready for hearings or trial.

I do believe there are unethical people (including divorce attorneys) who would do what they can to screw people over, even when going through tramatic experiences. The key to finding one who considers it his/her job to put the best interests of the client first. One way to do that is by using references and referrals from people who've been there.

all I have to say to that is

AMEN!!!

You have to realize that a divorce is a business transaction. A person is hiring a lawyer. They need to be interviewed.

I am glad you included "some" as well. And Lynne brought up several good points.

My divorce was expensive, but she was very quick to tell me when arguing over something would be a no-win situation, due to the associated costs. Example: The finalization of our Separation Agreement boiled down to one $800. item. He was not letting that go. I would have walked away with the item after spending at least $1200. going to trial. Does not make financial sense. She finally beat it into my head that, at some point, it is no longer a numbers/spreadsheet game. I heard that MANY times.

I believe that, more often than not, if you are getting financially screwed in lawyer fees, it is time to get a new lawyer.

I would have loved to have settled months ago but stbx has dragged it out. We go to trial March 4. Hopefully it will be done. But that day alone will cost me over $1,000 in legal fees.

If I get out of this divorce paying my attorney less than $10,000, I'll consider myself lucky.

My 2cents:I had to fire my original lawyer because he would not answer a simple question-via face to face,email or over phone.He seemed to busy to return my calls.My second atty was a bulldog!She rocked his(ex)world.She had his atty write u the divorce decree instead charging me for her to do it.She even took of extra $300 since we didnt have to go to trial.I thank God for people like her.Someone who wants to get into this mess and try to sort things out.It takes a special person to do their job.She was a necesary evil, as some say.But she definitely was ethical and straight to the point.I dont want to think about where I would be right now without her.Luci

my attorney cost were 27K, i felt it was an absorbent amount , but in all reality , she did did her job very well.
Looking back , she was worth every penny..

I'm not divorced yet, and I'd prefer to avoid the pain of court and judges, but to do mediation requires that BOTH parties be willing to act like mature adults. My husband keeps saying he'll agree to something and then changes his mind. My son, who is a realtor, says no ethical realtor will try to sell our house when he/she realizes the parties don't agree. I feel really stuck in this big, unfinished house. I know the real estate market sucks for selling, but it's good for buying, so why do I have to wait to put it on the market. My husband can live with his mom, but I have no other place to live. Maybe a bulldog attorney can talk some sense into a bulldog spouse. I don't want to get totally screwed!

$5/minute with a minimum of 6 minutes. My lawyer says I talk too fast. I say I can't talk fast enough.
The problem is I have a nut case ex that likes to use lawyer letters to make what she wants sound important- the lawyer does charge too much but she is the one with no self control.
I guess if I was losing this battle I may have a different perspective.

No correction, Most Attorneys are like leaches, they suck and suck you dry.... The weird thing is they never seem to blow-up(explode)????