Its all a process and it all takes time. The grief will
Come whether you want it or not. There is one Way
and that is thru it. Think of yourself like a widow With
losses and concerns then you get a better Picture
of what you are up against emotionally.

Divorce care and therapy will help a lot to keep
You on track and get thru the process of divorce.

You don't say if you are using lawyers or not . That
Whole part of the actual divorce is something to
Just Get thru and survive emotionally, financially
And with some sanity, HUGS

Wow. I'm so sorry. I can empathize because I've been there. You are not alone. Sending love and compassion your way.

Thank you so much

Hugs, my friend. I understand perfectly well. It is so hard. Now it is time for you. Be ready to be blamed for everything and anything he can think of. Whatever you do, do not agree to anything, no matter how tempting he is making it sound. At least his mother is not enabling him. My ex in laws were the cause of the breakup. Calm down enough to get a lawyer, then find yourself a therapist to help you navigate through all of this. Most of all be gentle with yourself. When you do see him, just smile, turn around and walk away. You do not owe him anything. That will bother him more than anything you can say or do. Now is the time to pamper and look after yourself.

Early in my separation I tried to stay so strong, I realize now I was in the denial stage of the grieving process. Then I started having uncontrollable episodes of crying at work. I knew I had to get control over when and where I had break downs. So when I had breaks or lunch at work I would get a box of Kleenex go to my car, or sit on the toilet in the restroom and have my cry. The worst thing I did was call my stdx during my breakdowns. I just wanted him to take my pain away and tell me why he didn't want to try and save our marriage, but all that did was make things worse because he couldn't or wouldn't give me any answers and I just felt more rejection. I've learned sinse then I was probably dealing with narcissistic discard. Extremely confusing and painful. It's been 7 months and it has gotten easier. I say all this to let you know that no matter how hard we try to avoid it the grieving process has a mind of it's own. Let it happen. The best we can do is manage it in ways that doesn't cause us more injury or loss. HUGS and Prayers!!!

Thanks so much it's hard dealing with breakdowns. I will be okay and then my mind will wander and bam! I'm right back to crying my eyes out. I juat want to fastfoward and be out of pain

I would hold it together Until i could get into my
car. I would Literally count the hours and minutes
until i Could get home to cry. I cried for 4 months
of deep Sobbing.

It does help with some release of your pain, hurt
And rejection. When i stopped the deep crying i
did not get any real Release. I can still cry but its
Only Short lived. HUGS