This question is probably more for the men on here- but I would appreciate anyone's insight (have any of the women had this experience?). I know that men and women (tend to) view sex differently... most women I know would like to have a level of relationship before jumping into bed with someone (I know this isn't universal- but maybe the majority?)- and many men I know could probably have sex with someone whether they have an emotional connection or not- sometimes it's just a physical act. I get that dynamic- and I am really not a prude. My feeling is that in a loving, monogamous relationship- sex is great. But what are the rules for dating these days?

I met an older gentlemen recently (he was 17 years older than me in fact) and he seemed very sweet, very appreciative and thoughtful and made a point to me that "older guys are more settled and mature". I thought that he sounded fantastic- a really safe guy- someone to hang out with- get to know and although I wasn't thinking long term (I am not sure I am ready for a serious relationship right now)... I was keeping an open mind. I knew the guy for less than a week- hadn't even gone on our first official date yet (had only been talking on the phone)- and yesterday he starts texting me really perverted messages while I was at work... ALL DAY LONG. I was quite surprised (we jumped from a conversation about his granddaughter on Monday night- to the next day him asking me repeatedly to send naked pictures of myself- but stated in much greater detail than that...). Last night I talked to him and said that I wasn't ready for that level of relationship- kind of wanted to be friends first... see what happens.. and he said "Oh that's too bad- I thought you were ready to date." To which I replied- "I thought I was, too, but I guess I was hoping to slow down on the sex talk for a while." and He came back with "I am really disappointed, I liked you a lot and I wanted to have sex with you." And I said "I am not going to right away, if that's a deal breaker then we should probably just end this now." And he said "Yes, I want sex. I need sex. I know there are guys who will wait for you. I will miss you. Good luck." WTF?? Truly- I appreciate his honesty- saves us both a lot of grief- but seriously- was this just a bad first experience, or have the rules for dating changed so much over the last 18 years (the last time I dated I was 22) that now you have to be ready to jump into bed immediately or be wiling to talk dirty with a complete stranger? I do understand that a guy probably wouldn't be interested in dating someone who will never have sex- that's not what I am saying- I am just asking whether there are new expectations for how quickly one should be ready to get physical? If there really are "new rules" I definitely want to understand them- perhaps I am not ready to date after all. I really hope this was just a fluke... otherwise I think I will have to become a nun....