Getting back in the dating world is up to you! You and only you will know when you are ready to get back out there...if you have any feelings for past relationships, don't go out yet, or that will interfere. You will know when you are ready to go again

I've been on one coffee date and it was okay actually. He's a friend of a friend and is in a similar situation but already divorced. We bitched about our ex's a little, shared some laughs and we'll probably meet again. I'm over my ex completely though. I think because he was abusive it was very easy for me to be 100% done. I don't think I'd be at this stage if that hadn't been the case though. I'd exhausted all efforts with him way before I left so I was ready for someone new before I'd even separated from him.
It was refreshing btw to meet with someone new and to know it's very unlikely they're carrying around the same issues as my ex. Makes it easier to breathe when you don't have to walk on eggshells all the time with someone.

Dynamaniac had great advice. Concentrate on making friends first, not dating. Let it come naturally. If you focus too hard on dating, you'll set yourself up for more disappointment, hurt and pain. You don't need this now, your still healing.

You said you need to fill a void. Be careful...you need to fill that void yourself, not with another person. If you do, you'll always be dependant on that person making you whole. You need to be whole on your own, otherwise you'll be repeating the same pattern to which you are trying to break.

Take this time to work on yourself and your self esteem. There are all kinds of self improvement exercises and courses out there. Discover who you are, your likes and dislikes. Once you are happy and ok with who you are, then you'll be ready to date.
Stay strong
-HUGS-

i went on my first date this past weekend, i was nervous since its been almost 6 months since ive gone on a date. a part of me didnt want to go because i was so used to my last relationship it didnt feel right but i decided that i needed to let go and try and put myself out there. i was nervous but luckily the date went great and we are gonna hang out this weekend also. i know its not easy but you have to try and put yourself out there and if it doesnt work then you know youre not ready and should wait a little

Thank you for posting Godhelpme. I have been having the same thoughts about dating. It's frightening to have to start over. It's nice to read everyone's advice. Good luck to you. Hugs.

Wow I was wondering the same. I was in a ten year relationship. Thinking to myself what do people do? Bar/club is not for me

I want to know too! If I start too soon it'll be an unhealthy relationship....but that could happen even if I wait to start dating. So what's the answer?

I wish I knew everyone. Bad night tonight. Feels terrible being here and going back to the drawing board. I guess I am not ready. :(

I am not there, not even close to wanting to date. Maybe. I did find myself being a little flirty in the waiting room the other day. Not that I know if the guy was married or not, but I did the "you look familiar" thing just to see if I could actually speak with a man and look him in the eyes. I did, he didn't run to the other side of the waiting room, the world didn't stop spinning. I guess I could date again some day and not die. Lol.

I had a man say the same thing to me yesterday. Then said I was to young to have kids. Maybe he was flirting with me jojored. I am so stunned....lol. Good to know.

I joined divorce care email and although it is a religious posting ...the daily email I received was right on point with where I am at in thinking about dating...it said something to the effect of comparing it to just putting novacain on a broken foot. Sure you can still walk around but one day you will look down and u will see a bone protruding (gross I know) ...anyway it said what you need to do is stabilize, brace and strengthen the foot...i.e. the heart.

To be honest, I am sure not when I would have time to date considering being a single mom now. If I get 5 minutes by myself in a day I am lucky!