That's the thing about hope - there is an infinite supply so don't give up.

Orange, you are 22. I wish I was 22...you have your whole life and just beginning. Give it time. Don't get mad at the women that you say "flake out". They are in the same boat as you. They gave you their time for a while. They are just trying the best fit possible. I've heard you have to kiss a 1000 frogs to find a princesses.

Think of it as a process. You can't focus it. It will take time. Each person you met or date helps you learn more about what you want. You may think you know but well I'm more than twice your age and I don't.

You'll find the love of your life or many loves. Just be the best you. Be happy and be willing to share that happiness.

I felt the need to respond to this because I felt like you around this time last year when I posted. I was extremely lost and going through a terrible loss and split with my ex fiance then. Some days, it's still hard to push through but the key thing is that I do it. I don't let my past define me.

Consistency is key.
This may seem daunting and who knows what you've been through and the challenges you've faced through your time and post split. But this gives you a chance to learn more about yourself... what you like and don't like. It may not seem like it right now but this is a blessing in disguise. Like I said, we all have our moments.

Look, I am trying to finish my associates degree in nursing. That is my ONLY priority right now and to say that I haven't missed finding someone who was at my level isn't a surprise. We are human. We crave being close and intimate with someone. I just look at it as a sign that I'm not ready or at my best for the person who I am meant to be with. If my priority was to be in a relationship, I could very well make that happen. However, I dont want to settle and neither should you.

There are good people out there and women who would appreciate the things you'd have to offer. Don't let your ex and her mistakes take those qualities away from you. The qualities that make you who you are as a person. Those are what made her like you in the first place and maybe you'll stop the "one you're meant to be with" from being with you in the end ultimately.

By the way, please be positive. I know things may seem rough right now but these things really do take time and alot of work to get through. Just throwing a smile at someone or being that "happy go lucky person" in people's company can change the tone of the day as well as well as theirs. I hope today is a better day for you and the rest to come.

Orangblast95- lol as per Nicholas1993- you have sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
much time- relax, Breathe do meditation- strengthen the relationship with yourself in this Special time that you have with yourself= it is truly
a blessing in disguise such as Foreverago1432 stated.
The most profound relationship that you will have in this world is with Oneself
Hugs

@Nicholas1993 I am trying to enjoy myself each day. It is a work in progress.

@Foreverago1432 I appreciate you taking the time to write what you did. It has been challenging for me since the breakup. I have been throwing myself into college a lot more. Girls have been coming in and out of my life, but I am not letting it phase me because if they want to be a part of my life, then they will put in the effort.

@Ohsheana I appreciate you encouraging me to relax. I have been working on being more calmer around stressful situations.

Of course. Anytime. I can empathize with you as a whole. Right now, things are going to be shitty! It is a breakup. There's no sugar coating it. Your education is always a good thing to focus on and no one can take that away from you.

Don't give up and be bitter because of your ex. Let's just say that I've been there and done that, and it got me no where.

I know you may be rolling your eyes at this, but you're going to be okay. Things do get better. Take it a day at a time. Take care of yourself and spend time with loved ones and close friends if you have the time to. It helps ease the pain a little. Some days are going to be wonderful and others not so much. Most importantly, at the end of the day, just breathe and be thankful for what you have.

@Foreverago1432 I feel like I am getting better each day but there are days where I don't go out of my room like today. Today I've felt trapped in my depression. I haven't eaten a lot or socialized the entire day. I feel like make significant steps forward but take 1,000 steps backward in one day. I miss having a companion that is there for me through the rough days like today. I am going to a party tonight but by myself.

Hey there, that is completely normal for you to experience. It's easier to stay confined and secluded in your room than to get out and do something out of the ordinary. However, we just need that little push to get us there like that party youre talking about going to..

How did that go? Did it help at least?

I do want to emphasize that the feelings you have that come in bouts (good and bad days) are going to happen until you have accepted the way that things are.

For me, it's been a year since my split and I still have my days. What helps is working towards goals and proper distraction but trust me, just the other day, I was discouraged.

Each person has their way of coping with things, but just know that there are people that care for you and want you to succeed and be happy.

Yes, you've experienced a great deal of pain and heartbreak, but it wasn't for nothing. I'd personally like to believe there are better things to come. Your future wasnt destined with that person sadly.

Stay positive and be strong. If not for yourself, then for your family, friends. What's that saying, fake it til you make it? Make that your mantra.

@Foreverago1432 I did go to the party. It was a lot of fun, and I had a great time. However, towards the end, I started to get very discouraged because I began to see couples having fun. It made me sad because I would've loved to go with someone I care about the most.

This week has been very difficult for me because the nightmare began on my birthday which is coming soon. There's been this one woman who has stood me up many times and never to respond to my texts. For example, I texted her on Monday about the Halloween party that she invited me to. She has yet to return to that text from Monday.

She asked me to this party because I finally called her out on standing me up and not replying to my messages. What should I do? Should I go to the party? I am worried if I go to this party, that I will be in the friend zone for good.

Hey good evening! Nice to hear that the party went adequately well. I'm sure that that surprised you that it went better than you expected it to go.

I do relate to that feeling in the end there about seeing couples being together and getting to do all those things that everyone does around the holidays. It sort of makes me a little sick, but I'm okay with the way things are now than I was before. Lol

Anyhow, to me, this woman doesn't seem like she should even get as much attention or time that you're giving her if she doesn't seem to be giving that back to you. To me, if someone were interested in someone, they would take the time to answer at a reasonable time and make effort to meet up. You wouldn't feel any less and have a feeling of comfort knowing that they're reciprocating your interest in them as well.

That is MY opinion though. I don't want that to influence what you should do. You ultimately know what would make you happy and satisfied.

Hopefully I helped. I'm here if you need anything. Btw, your birthday is coming up. Celebrate it:)

Let me know what you end up doing. I'm sure you'll figure it out. Try to have a good day!

@Foreverago1432 This woman has been very hot and cold with me which I don't appreciate. I don't like it when people waste my time especially more than once. I am leaning towards not going because it gives me the chance to get hurt on my birthday which I don't need this year. I thought of getting in my car and drive with no destination whatsoever.

I do appreciate having someone to talk to like yourself because it's nice to talk to someone who has been through what I am going through right now.

Sounds like she's giving you mixed signals. If you want something serious with her, doesn't sound like she's ready. If you like the adrenaline rush of not knowing what to expect, she could be a distraction which is understandable.

And you don't have to not go, you could go with friends or something? That way, you'll get out of your daily norm of a routine and possibly have a good time, meet new people?? Just an option. Easier said than done, I know. I'm going out soon once my quarter ends for a few drinks and even that seems a little too much right now! Lol

And no biggie, I just felt like I could help you. I know I met someone on here who did the same last year and I came a long way.

No birthday plans!?!? You have to at least treat yourself!

@Foreverago1432 I did not even go to the party simply because she didn't even pay enough attention to give me an address. She came up to me on Monday, all hugging me and everything. She said she gave me an address and she didn't. I also found it alarming that she literally had to search my name in her text messages because she had so many. That to me is a big red flag to me because that put the fork in it with her to me.

I did go on a third date with a girl and it was fun but she asked me the "what are we" question and honestly, I am frozen inside because I can't get past this invisible wall I have in front of me from my ex girlfriend emotionally abusing me. This new girl is really sweet but she also has problems that i don't like but I'm not sure how to approach the situation.

Lately, I've been having bad memories in my head from my ex girlfriend, most of them make me sad because I have been missing her company. It has been a year since her and I have broken up. She tries to continue to talk to me but I am trying to block her out of my life even though she was a major part of it for two years.

Yeah, you sound incredibly annoyed which who would blame you. Who has time for games, and I can see that you're still in alot of pain.

You seemed to enjoy your time with the date from the sounds of it. But when you mentioned the woman just in general, she didn't seem like someone you're extremely into. Maybe someone to mend the heartbreak you still face about your ex?

I guess at this point, would you continue to go out with her? And if so, do you think you'd open up and be honest with her about your apprehensions?? Maybe she'd be able to understand. Take things slow until enough time passes to clear your head. See what it is that you want?

You said she is sweet but doesn't exactly mean that she is a fit for you.

Personally, it being a year separated from your ex, that isn't alot of time. It has been the same for me, and I still struggle daily. Trust me, there's nothing wrong with you in general. That is normal. You invested alot of time in your rapport and still love her. I get that.

Being emotionally abused, makes the split more difficult than it needs to be. You have all those scars to heal from and maybe youre probably trying to understand how it came to this and what could have been done or said to prevent such things. Though all you can do is focus on the present. That's why everyone emphasizes "no contact" with the ex. Difficult yes, saving your sanity on the other hand is better than losing it.

Hope this is helping? I normally write excessively long to try to get my point across.