Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
Many of you know my story. My ex broke up with me back in Feb and after a few months of anger, we ended up getting on good terms and have had some very good heart to heart conversations. The latest heart to heart was back on Nov 10th, we sat down and talked for two hours. The good the bad and the ugly, what was missing and etc. He told me I was absolutely right about things and I told him he was right about things. He is in another relationship and from our conversation, he told me he knew he made a mistake and needs to basically figure it out. I did let him know that I was dating. The very next morning after our conversation, he sent me a text and asked, when I get home from work, would you have supper ready. My reply, was, ??? when, today, huh. His reply was No, I was just thinking about one of the things that was missing from our relationship. I said Oh Ok, I get it. Which I did, because, one of his complaints was that I never took the initiative to cook, he always did. Now fast forward, I hear absolutely nothing from him after that, not even on Thanksgiving. Then this past Friday, Dec 6, I get the Christmas E-Card wishing me a Merry Christmas. So, I just replied Thanks, back at ya. I just thought it was weird, as before our long talk he would text about once a week about something, like I have mail, or did you watch the game or something immaterial.
We can all tell you its this or its that, but only you and he know the conversations you had, the intentions of those conversations and what may or may not be implied. While he has always showed courtesy since the split, I wouldn't know what some of the recent comments he has written to you would imply or mean. I woudn't just chalk it up to "just talk" cus who writes the "having supper ready" and "missing from our relationship" comment ... what is the purpose of those comments.
The Ecard might just be a card of courtesy or reaching out as he has done over the last few months so I wouldn't focus too much on that. Its a nice gesture between two people that care about each other, even as friends. But the other conversations and comments lead me to think there may be some feelings or unresolved things for him. Again, only you would know based on yours and his talks.
hang in there, my friend.
I think your short and to the point responses are great and the fact that you only respond to him when he reaches out to you. No contact saved my life. If I were still communicating with him I would be on a roller coaster still and he would be the conductor. I would be saying he didn't call what does that mean, he did call and said blah blah blah... what did he mean by that? I would over analyze everything. So for me talking just doesn't work and I know I am in no way ready to be his friend or hear about his personal life.
I can totally see how you are putting thought into what this means because it's a change from how you guys were communicating. My advice would be just try not to read too much into it and keep doing what you are doing only responding when he reaches out and respond in kind. Time and his future actions will tell you more and give way to more clarity. Hang in there! (((((( hugs))))))