Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

13,010 Members

100,360 Posts

0 Online

nix192 05/15/2011

Ive been a totall idiot again i fell in love thought it was mutual and have yet again been let down in the most heartbreaking way. Why is it they just cant be honest with me? what do i do wrong? why do i let myself get sucked in and then spat out when they have had enough????
Long story short i met an amazing man who treated me like a princess and made me feel so special i fell in love with him and he said he did me too.We both have issues so we knew it was going to be hard but up until yesterday he was still being the most loving man ive ever known.
Then i dont hear from him since yesterday evening and when i do eventually get hold of him he comes out with all this negative stuff and says he dosent know what to do now. I am totally gutted and as before you guys helped me heal the pain i was hoping you could do the same this time.When will i ever learn not to wear my heart on my sleeve?????

deleted_user 05/15/2011

I think he just has too much on his mind with losing his job... Give him a little space, and try not to read too much into the fact that he said he won't be answering his phone for a bit. Who knows? Maybe he wants to keep the remaining charge for a job offer phone call...???

The uncertainty sucks, but like someone else said--he's either in or he's out. There's not a whole lot you can do about either, other than be there for him when he decides he needs you.

Hugs to you. (((nix)))

nix192 05/15/2011

Hes text me a few times this evening telling me about his day out to the beach with his kids and how tired he is. we had planned for him to come down tonight but i guess thats not happening now.He said he has to be at work for this big meeting at 9 in the morning.hes emptying his van out now. hes calling me sweetheart and putting on loads of kisses but i dont know what to think anymore.

deleted_user 05/15/2011

Just read it for what it says--he's calling you sweetheart and "putting on loads of kisses". It sounds like he cares about you.
He's under a lot of stress... just be supportive.
Try to relax. Hugs to you: (((nix)))

nix192 05/15/2011

thankyou you are right im just trying to be as supportive as i can be.

deleted_user 05/15/2011

If all he is focusing on is the problems without committing to work on it and suggesting solutions he's not participating in the relationship. This is not your fault. Going from hot to cold like this is not a good sign. Focus on what you need right now. A genuine committed love would work on the problems. Let's see if he recognizes that.

lance139169 05/15/2011

With all due respect to some other people here, I would caution you to not blow this out of proportion. Although a romantic relationship is an important part of life, its not the ONLY thing in life. There has to be an appropriate balance of activities, or a relationship WILL end. This guy has not done anything wrong except neglect to call several times a day, and he is being portrayed as a jerk.

I think he needs to be cut some slack.

deleted_user 05/15/2011

I do think you may be overreacting, but...I do the same thing!! So I'm not judging you on that. I'm almost in the same situation right now, waiting for him to call....
How long have you two been seeing each other?

nix192 05/16/2011

thankyou guys I woke up this morning and text him good luck for this morning and that i am thinking of him,he just replied thankyou and that was all so even though its going to kill me im going to leave it at that now and if he wants me he knows where i am.

Join the Conversation