I know exactly how you feel. Unfortunately I cannot offer you any advice as that is what I am trying to find also. but know you are not alone

What both of you said. I'm terrible at taking my own advice. The mental photo album is constantly going. Some things work, some things don't. It's still very fresh for me, 95 days, just gone, no word since, like she disappeared, no explanation either after 6 years of being my "soul mate and best friend". And it's not even for another guy. I had my issues, but, they never seemed to infiltrate our love for one another, she wasn't perfect either, just perfect to me. Hope you feel better some day, let me know if you need to vent anytime, you are not alone and many of us are looking for the same thing.

I keep telling myself and I have said it to others as well that there are way too many good people in this world for our "one" to be the only one for us in all reality.

That said, I know exactly how you feel.

I know how you feel and you'll accept it eventually. I am there. Everyday is a battle but going back isn't an option so I am not going to chicken out at this point. Give it time. With time your new routine will feel normal.

I know the feeling. I pray everyday he comes back.

Sometimes I think I should try dating to make that pain go away, but then my stomach gets all tied up in knots about meeting someone new.

Problem is.....I dont have a choice. Its over. If its meant to be, we will somehow find our way back together, but if its not meant to be, then just maybe there is someone else the universe has in store for us, and maybe it will be even better. :)

Take it day at a time. Little by little you wont feel so bad. Unfortunately, all I keep hearing is time is the key to getting better.

Good Luck!

So sorry to say, but time will heal. You need to find things that make you happy and keep you busy so that you begin to live your life without him. It took me many years. It wasn't a choice I wanted, but it happened and I needed to make myself happy once again. We were together 26 years. It's difficult and it takes a conscious effort every day. Time will be your friend.

Oh this feeling truly is one of the hardest ones to feel. I am on this roller coaster daily. I imagined myself with my husband forever, done never needed anyone else. Oddly enough he didn't share in those feelings. Time is the healer and just try to get through the sadness. It comes in waves, cry it out don't ignore it. Dealing with the pain does help you to feel better. Work through one thought at a time. For me at first every single thing we did, every family member and memory ran through my mind at once. I have tried to cry through one thought at a time and once I feel that I have grieved that I move onto the next. Just hang onto hope and the idea that this will make you stronger and you will love again.

Sorry for your circumstances, I have been there all too recently,
How to go on? For me , I came to see that regardless of what I hoped for , regardless of right thing , my wife had made her decision and I had to realize that regardless of how much I loved her, how much I didn't. "Deserve" it , what it would do to our kids, that it was done .
Life is about doing the right thing regardless of the good or bad that is flung at us .
The right thing for me is to be father I have always been, the son and brother, the friend, the employee, and all of that gnat I have always been ,,,,, strive to be better at all of those and to
Be thankful for what I have.
Life is about living....live today

@Brooklynn...
I'm so sorry you are going through such a painful time. ..
I so know how that feels and continues to feel 3 years later... arrrrr... it's so frustrating, lonely and aching... I have so many memories everywhere it at times is overwhelming and destructive to my psychical... physical and emotional health...
I have times ... stretches of time where I do well????
What ever that means.. I guess functionality capable not spending time a lot of time obsessing and wondering what mt STBXH
is doing...
who is he with... why doesn't he love me...
blah... blahhh.... blahhhhhhh....
I even went into a depression treatment center for a month this divorce Spiros me 2 a deep depression and I lost so much weight got down to 90 pound and the doctors where saying I was going to die! I finally cut off all contact with my soon to be ex husband all social media and that seemed to help for a while!
However his best friend lives right across the street from me they go riding on a weekly basis! Every Sunday I hear his motorcycle come down the street he parks in front of the neighbors house...
walks to the front door and they takeoff!
Its hard knowing he is just steps away! How can he look at the house we lived in together and not have any feelings???
When he knows that I still love him ...
he doesn't care that ...
I am hurting...
want our marriage back...
I can't pay bills
have no money. ..
Cause he took all the money I had received from a trust my father left me when he left...
have been in a health crisis and he can care less... smh...
he is a passive aggressive mean selfish man...
but yesterday he sent me an email with a picture attachment and it also said call me. .
well I could not open the attachment so I shot him back in email saying ...
I cannot open the picture and what's up??? Well he sent me back an email saying what was it that you sent me and I said what??? He said the email that you sent me said...
if you want me to call me!
I told him that he was way off that my message did you want me to call you! And he said oh I'm sorry it was early I was half asleep anyways can you send me a picture! I said what for??? And he said oh nevermind I'm sorry I won't bother you again!
What the heck is that all about??? He keeps on doing this back and forth fortunately I use to go over to his house and be intimate with him thinking he had come to his senses and loves me again only to be disappointed and humiliated because...
He would not call again until the next episode! Now its only via email or text!
stay strong girl ....
I can only say cutting off communication was probably the healthiest thing for me!
God bless you ...
I wish you the best ...!
praying for you!

It is a matter of time.You will forget him promise .

Grieve if you must, but don't shut your world out because of a lost love. There is a reason for everything that happens, you might not understand it right now, but later on it will become clear to you why these terrible things should happen. Take things one day at a time, but don't sulk at one corner. Stay with the company of friends, find something you can get busy with, and let yourself heal a little everyday. You will find the love you deserve at the right time, at the right place. Believe and hope. :-)

A while back I had given you some exercises to help with obsession. Did you look at them and try them?

Atgb yes I did look at it. And the obsession part of it has gotten much better. I still really miss him though.

I can only tell you my own experience. He's been "gone" a couple of years now. He moved her here to our small town and married her. We do no contact. Not because I'm angry, but because it's the only way I know to even try to move forward. I love him still. I think that I always will. But, he's like kryptonite to me.
I put one foot in front of the other because that's all I can do. sometimes I try to fill the hours with friends, etc. Other times I wallow in self pity. I sleep a lot.
At first, I did date some. Not a whole lot of interest out there for middle aged women. Just the way it is. Now, I just accept that this is my life and probably will be till I die. Thankfully, there' s less time ahead of me than behind me. I've stopped trying to change it. Now I just try to get through it, one hour at a time.