Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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mwitt5578 03/19/2017

long story short I have had issues with lying through our 10 year marriage, I never cheated or drank or anything like that. I know that I am at fault for our marriage ending. We are living under the same roof for the sake of our 3 children and one day we will explain to them why we both stayed. During the last few months my Wife has reconnected with an old crush of hers. He lives in Cali (we are in NY) but he goes to PA to visit his family from time to time. She asks me tonight if I can get a couple days off in a row the first week of April because she has to go on a business trip with her friend. My gut tells me he is in PA and she is going to southern NY to meet him. I know she's emotionally moved on from me amd living her own life on that level now but I have no idea what to do here. My prayer is that my job will say No. It just hurts so much that she is ready to go have sex with another man.

bakerjackie321 03/19/2017

You don't know she is going to have sex with another man. Does she lie to you too? If not ask her. If you know that you have hurt her (by lying) then take accountability, get the time off and help her find happiness.

Nick2017 03/19/2017

I know how u feel. it's terrible. my advice to u is try to work it out with her if there is still hope. if not this is a chance to be closer to your children. the sex part is what hurt you the most. if u can pass it it would be easier. life is a dynamic event which some part u don't have comtrol over. if really that is what she wants then is she really worth your love? and if someone really wants to have sex with a married woman , do u think he would respect her? or doing it just for the physical desire. soon enough she would get hurt and feel betrayed as well. life has karma. don't think she is better off with that man.. think about u now and what u can do to make u happy with or without her.

mwitt5578 03/19/2017

In her mind we are "separated" and she is single. I understand both points here. I know I hurt her many times. I'm currently in counseling to work on all my issues without myself for the sake of our children. And yes I want her to be happy so maybe I should try to get the time off so she can be purchased the images in my head of her with another man and a man like this just makes me sick

Nick2017 03/19/2017

I would say focus on u and your children. be a good dad. I would also say u do not need to do things to make her happy which would hurt u. again, if she is willing to work it out together then by all means try your best together to make it. but else, focus on you. find things to do to lift your spirit up, to help u regain your self confidence, your mental balance.

jpath 03/28/2017

Hey mwitt5578,

Sorry to hear you are going thru this,

Are there some fun things you and your wife did while you were dating?

What was some of the cool things you guys did that led to falling in love?

I have heard about marriage retreats that allow couples to reconnect and had great results. Some of the couples said it was their last hope and turned out to be a pleasant surprise.

You guys are in my prayers,

J

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