What will it take for you to understand what she wants is for you to leave her alone. She wants space away from you....and you refuse to give it. You cheated on her, you hurt her, you drove her away, and you won't giver her the space she wants to process what you've put her through. What does she have to do to make you get it????

leave the woman alone, for pete's sake.

Hey nightfire, I've got a quick question for you. Are we going to have another 87 post thread about how you turned your wife into the primary breadwinner, kept tabs on her and controlled her every move out of love and concern for her, while you spent all your free time cheating on her and ruining her financially, and didn't think she'd ever leave you but now that she did leave you, you are real sorry for all that and truly don't UNDERSTAND why she want's nothing to do with you? Most of us don't have it us to continue this prattle with you. Just saying...

i see i need to not really talk about things much with her and let her message me

Good choice. Give her time to miss you and think about how to best reconcile with you, if that's what she wants. :-)

And that means really let HER message you, not wait a few days, then worry she forgot your number so you had to text just to check, then wait a few days, then worry she lost her phone so you had to text just to check.

It means really leave her alone and let her text to you. I know you think that we're being mean to you. But we're trying to make you understand that if you don't stop, this woman is never going to have anything to do with you ever, much less text you. You need to get that.

@Nightfire,

You do realize that every time you disregard your wife's expressed wishes (Please do not contact me; I need time and space to figure things out.), you merely serve to reinforce the reasons she left you in the first place and you drive another nail into the coffin of your relationship, right?

Believe me, when she makes her decision regarding the future of your relationship, you WILL be the first one to know.

Or then again, she may contact her family law attorney first. Then you of course would be the second one to know...

"i meant nothing ill about it, im just trying to understand better and it blows up in my face"

Oh, you poor little thing, You ONLY had the best of intentions and this all blows up on you. You are the real victim here I see. Shame on her for not seeing how truly loving and caring you are.

I don't know ur back story at all. But looks like you cgeated on her and she wants you to leave her alone. If you want any chance in the whole wide world that maybe for some weird reason she would consider to reconcile you better start understanding what you did. If you had any clue what betrayal does to a person and how intensely someone gets hurt by cheating you would have her ashamed of ur actions and respect her wished. Startcreading read untill you realize what cheating dies to soneone.