Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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GiveMeWings 10/02/2007

Outside of my kids, I have alot of freedoms and I enjoy that. At some point I have to stop being a Mom and be a woman. Dating is fun but I have such a hard time finding the man that has the morals I want and a passoinate side to go with it. All I seem to find are 2 types of men..... christain men who have great morals but are a little on the prude side - afraid to even discuss where they stand in this area. On the other hand, there is bad boy who has no morals at all. I don't want either of this type. My family has an opinion about everything, God love 'em. They feel I should find a man that is suitable for my home life.... I agree to an extent. But, if we are not compatible in other areas... were is that going to go? I realize sexual compatibility is not the only important thing. What is more difficult then finding someone to fit this bill, is getting my folks to respect that I need someone who has similar intrests in this area. But they make me feel selfish. :( I know there has got to be healthy relationships out there that have exciting sex regularly that are good parents all at the same time!! Next time they ask me why it didnot work out with Mr. Nice Guy I will no longer tell them Mr. Nice Guy was also boring...

deleted_user 10/02/2007

Not selfish at all! You want you want, plain and simple. Good for you for knowing what that is.

deleted_user 10/02/2007

It is not selfish to "settle". It is doing whats Right.

I was someones "nothing special" for a very long time. I wish that He had been Selfish and kept on looking. Would have allowed Me to have a Life.

There is someone out there that will knock your socks off. Until then-who Cares what your family thinks. They each make their Own choices.

:-)

deleted_user 10/02/2007

First of all, if YOU are happy, your kids will eventually be happy, so don't worry too much yet about a good stepdaddy for your kids:) Find someone who makes you feel sexy/special/exciting/comfortable, and if you are lucky things will sort themselves out.

You are already ahead of the game in that you know the two types you DON'T want to date...unfortunately you can't tell just by looking at a guy which category he's going to fall into *lol* All you can do is continue to date and hopefully find that one man that fits the best. Good luck!

deleted_user 10/02/2007

Hold out for the man with the qualities you desire. He is out there for you and really, what's the rush. I keep hearing it's a numbers game and I really think there is something to be said for this. Look at you, you're gorgeous. He will come, most likely when you aren't looking. Just keep being you.

Southernmedic 10/02/2007

I once heard that men want a lady in public and a whore in the bedroom. While I am not sure I completely agree, it does have a lot of truth to it.

You just haven't met this guy yet. Trust me, we (me included) are out there.

Hang in there, stay away from the bad boys and keep that smile!

And, no, you are not being selfish! You will be a better parent, family member and person if you are happy.

deleted_user 10/02/2007

Unless I'm wrong, your family is a large part of your support base, probably part of the way you've been able to adjust so readily. If they truly love you, love has no strings attached, and they will eventually accept whoever you chose. You have to do what is right for you. You have to be selfish in that regard. You are going into a relationship with someone else, not your family.

deleted_user 10/02/2007

i kinda have the same problem, my family does the same thing. sometimes i feel i am being too picky or selfish. i don't want "boring" but i don't want "immature".

GiveMeWings 10/02/2007

Thanks all. It is amazing though the power that they have over me. Ultimately, I know the decision is mine, I just hate that in the back of my mind I feel selfish. Maybe I am the one who needs to get over that.

I will not settle for something that doesn't "knock my socks off" Tami. Thanks :)

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