Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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pam96 02/20/2010

My daughter is on the phone with her father right now & the entire conversation is about the wonderful, newly renovated house that he & the ow purchased together & how she (my daughter) will get to help paint her room, blah, blah, blah...
I got up & nonchalantly, left the room.. I could still here her talking to him, so I turn on the exhaust fan above the stove to drown it out...
I feel like a horrible parent to her because I cannot partake in the "joy" of THEIR new house. My daughter has even pointed out that I am less than enthusiastic for her but I know she is too young to understand. (She is 10).. .Sigh.. I hope the whole thing caves down around them while my daughter is home with me...
We were having an enjoyable evening till now & I know it will take awhile for me to shake the "who gives a shit" feeling...

DebbieC817 02/20/2010

HUGS....I feel for ya. I have to listen to my son have conversations with his dad over his new baby sister that is on the way (my ex is recently re-married and they have a baby girl due next month). I had always dreamed of having at least 2 children (I only have one) so this has been cutting me like a knife. And hearing how the ex treats his new wife - good as gold. It hurts, it really hurts. Hang in there....we'll survive somehow.

deleted_user 02/20/2010

(((hugs))) to you too!

pam96 02/20/2010

Debbie.. I understand exactly what you are saying!! I had wanted one more too & we had talked about & decided to have another one in July of '07.. he walked out in September... I was very angry for the longest time that he had cheated me out of having one more child. I refuse to have another one at 40 & with another man (that would be 3 kids by 3 different fathers.. no thanks!)
I can hardly wait until I hear "baby" is on its way.. I'm sure that will be coming soon..

deleted_user 02/20/2010

You are not being awful. You are being real with your feelings without badmouthing your ex to your child. Good for you! When she's older and you can discuss the breakup, she will understand and not think you were being awful either

lycesq 02/20/2010

Pam - you are not awful at all. Give your self big hugs and pats on the back for being so civilized with such a difficult situation. You are to be commended on your restraint (and this is from a lawyer who has seen it all!)

Big hugs.

Lynne

pam96 02/20/2010

Thanks everyone for the encouragement.. Sometimes I just feel like I'm not being a good mom by just walking away.. but I do realize it's better than the alternative..
Feeling better now though.. it always passes. :)

deleted_user 02/21/2010

(((Pam))) It is hard for you but I am glad that your daughter has a relationship with her dad. Mine has completely left her life and I can tell it is hard for her. She is 18 but she still could use a dad that cares for her.
Patti has a wonderful analogy of how hard it is to let go of someone while still having feelings. Healing will happen. Just enjoy the time that you spend with your daughter:-) Big hugs, Kimmee

MsViv 02/21/2010

Pam, you aren't awful. I give you \credit for getting up and leaving the room. I probably would have sat there stewing.
I wish the house sinks into the ground when they are sleeping.
And of course on a night when your daughter is home safe with you.

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