Miss*

What your going through can be rough on ones mind and body, for what your going through I'm not surprised that you've lost some weight and such.

If it helps any, your not on that boat alone! It now been 14 days since my ex-fiance had walked our the door for the final time. Since that happened I to have noticed some weight loss, I took visual notice enough to get my but on a scale and saw I'd lost 6 pounds over all this.

I think my weight loss, maybe like yours is the fact that at I haven't had that much motivation to get my butt into the kitchen and do much of anything in there. Yeah turkey sandwiches and chips are great, the occasional bowl of cereal is okay, a Swansons hungry man meal on occasion but their all "quick foods" but in my case I don't think the "quick foods" are sustaining my weight of a couple weeks ago.

So between the stress and heartaches and our minds being on overload, it's no wonder why some of us here might deal with weight loss. Just go easy on yourself, as many have told me, this takes time, don't bring yourself down by worrying about what your doing wrong, just put one baby step in front of the other and I'm sure things will work out.

And as far as animals, oh yeah, I get what your saying there. I currently have two wonderful little cat's, one six months ago was brought in from outside by my ex-fiance, that cat quickly learned that was her Mommy, did everything with her, would follow my ex-fiance around the house, sit in her lap while watching TV, hang out in the kitchen when my ex-fiance was cooking all the way to nudging a spot in what used to be "our bed" and sleeping right up next to her.

Both cat's have had it bad since my ex left, signs of depression, lower apatite, less interest in playing with their toy's, but my ex's cat has had it the worst. She now has that blank stare to her, like she's thinking W.T.F. where did Mom go? This cat will sit on her cat tree, right next to the living room window and nudge her head between the blinds and continually look outside, especially in the direction that my ex-fiance exited the property when she boarded the Airport shuttle and drove off, she keeps looking in the last known direction of where the van drove off.

And the late night blood curdling meows, where she'll sit directly next to the front door, looking at it, crying her ass off. I try my best to pick her up and love her the best I can, both cat's, but I know right now that my ex-fiance's cat isn't so much looking for the love from me, she wants it from someone else.

Hopefully that eventually our pet's, yours and mine will adapt to the changes and the moods they get in when they feel the stress of their surroundings. But I have to say, that if it wasn't for my two precious little girls here, I don't think I would be doing as fair as I am now.

Hang in there, we can only hope that it get's a lot better in time!

You are going to continue to hurt as long as you continue the contact with him. He is wrong for keeping you in limbo. I don't care what you did in your past; you still deserve love not breadcrumbs. I made the mistake of keeping contact with my ex following the breakup. Once he was able to move on, I had no one to help me move on.

Don't stop your life for this jerk. Yes, he is a jerk. I don't care how great of a guy he was for you. He's a jerk. A guy who loves you shouldn't cause you to cry everyday. Stop the contact so you can accept the end of your relationship. Reconciliation is possible, but it is usually during a substantial amount of time apart from that person and when both have become totally different people. By then, you may not even be interested in each other anymore. But think about it. If you are the same people going in to the same relationship, then the cycle will repeat itself and you will break up with each other again.

I'm not going to lie. It will hurt so much to not talk to your ex anymore. It will feel like a death, possibly worse. But it is the quickest way to get over a breakup. You are prolonging your healing. I bet he isn't failing his classes or anything. You have given him too much power. Empower yourself and force yourself to go no contact.

Brooklyn you need to take back control of your life. You wrote that you either need to be with him or not to be happy. You're not with him and you need to accept that. Yes, he strung you along for months but he ultimately told you he can't forgive you. It is over. You're letting someone who strung you along damage your health, your career and your education. He's not worth all that. If you haven't already done so, I strongly urge you to get into counseling right away.

I totally agree with Missy,
You are the only one who can help you move on from this mess YOU are causing yourself. You need to go total no contact with this guy who is stringing you along, not caring in the least how much you are hurting and take your life back, only you can do this.
Almost everyone has given you this advice.
As far as your poor dog, I feel he senses your mood and if you could be happier, so would the dog.
Please get counseling, so you can move on with your life.

The more you can't have it is the more you want it and are obsessing over it. I agree with getting counseling.

Want to know who has control over your healthy, job, school and ultimately your life??? YOU! No one else! You need to take control of your life and start moving forward.

I can't remember....are you seeing a therapist? While it does take time to heal you seem to be having trouble making any positive steps forward.

Hope you find the strength soon to take control of your life!

Hugs to you!!