Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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PeteMason 08/06/2017

I've met a woman whom I've fallen for, it was instant, the very first time I met her.

The problem is we are different to one another, she has been married twice, and to the same types of people. I am a different type and as a result she isn't into me. She says she is looking for someone different (like me) but how does she successfully do that if she only knows one type of person?

She is a classic like father like partner type. Her father labelled her as stupid in her childhood, and both of her husbands have treated her as if, how does she break the mould and get into someone like me?

PeteMason 08/06/2017

We are age appropriate, I'm two years older. She is only the second woman I have fallen in love with at first sight, and to be honest it has nothing to do with physical attractiveness as I find her not to be. My first love was the first female I fell in love at first sight with, and apart from her desire to argue and physically fight with me from time to time she was a beautiful creature. This lady indicates to me in no way that she is a fighter of any kind, and I'm guessing that may be my attraction to her.

PeteMason 08/06/2017

The unfortunate thing is my paying her attention is failing to register with her, it's as if she is unfamiliar with, and because of I'm probably wasting my time which is more than likely a good thing.

Ineemole 08/06/2017

I guess love is really blind :D

Danceintherain 08/06/2017

Unfortunately, it sounds like you may be setting yourself up for heartache. Or (hopefully not) to be used. Your past posts are concise and well thought out. You are very kind when responding on others posts. You have worked hard on your recovery. Have you asked yourself what caused you to fall for her? Is it physical or emotional falling? :)

PeteMason 08/07/2017

Good questions Danceintherain. Have I asked myself what caused me to fall for her? A very strong gut feel I believe. Is it physical or emotional falling? Definitely emotional only, she is no oil painting as it were, and that's fine because I want a relationship based on an emotional level in particular. And thanks for your kind remarks, you are the same type I'm sure.

Imlosingit 08/07/2017

Best advice I was ever given. Don't start a relationship, expecting to change the other person.

If you really care just be there, no pressure or trying to figure her out. She may need time, for things to be just all about her for a change. If she says she's not interested, be respectful.

PeteMason 08/07/2017

Wise advice Imlosingit, I will heed it, I've never been into changing anybody even though I'm a standard setter.

LeeKay 08/07/2017

Hey, PeteMason. I'm just checking on you today. How are you doing?

PeteMason 08/07/2017

How sweet of you LeeKay, I'm doing just fine, and yourself?

refurb 08/08/2017

? "Even though I'm a standard setter"

What do you mean by that?

Comment on falling in love with someone that doesn't "see" you,

Cmon really , what are you 12?

You are wasting your own time and energy ,

PeteMason 08/08/2017

Standard setter means I'm a leader.

"Cmon really , what are you 12?" I wish.

"You are wasting your own time and energy," correct, I made a move and she rejected me, she said I wasn't her type, surprise surprise, nothing ventured nothing gained though. I take rejection well as there are still plenty of fish in the sea as it were.

refurb 08/08/2017

leader, interesting

over/under 12?

i misunderstood your post, looked like you were pining away

(seems like we are wired very differently, take care & all the best)

forwardmotion 08/10/2017

Given that your ex cheated on you, I would suggest you take a step back and take a long hard look at the person you have fallen in love with.

She is a broken person with poor habits of loving men who give her attention and abuse her. She has poor self esteem and keeps being drawn into bad relationships.

You want to save her and be the white knight. I get it, but you may be getting yourself into the same situation you were in before. She may not be healthy enough to be in a good relationship.

PeteMason 08/10/2017

You are right in everything you say forwardmotion, since posting she has made me aware she is dating someone else already.

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