sorry hun i say get rid of them both.

Not much of a friend, more like a hound dog. They both knew what they were doing would be hurtful and they did it anyway and let you know that it had happened.

that happened to me also wes... i was totally blown away that a so called "friend" who knew how much i was hurting would go out with my ex.. it didn't matter if it was just two buds.. it hurt BIG time.. i confronted her.. i confronted him... it wasn't pretty... and i felt horrible afterwards... and i'm no longer friends with my so called "friend"... guess we can call it collateral damage... wish there was a way to understand why they do what they do

It sucks! I have to admit that many of my STBX's friends reached out to me when he first left...I guess because we had been together since we were 16 - they became my friends too...they were in no way inappropriate...just wanting to do things like shovel my driveway, fix my fireplace..."handy man" stuff. Maybe ask them what their intentions are before you jump to conclusions...perhaps they had just developed a friendship through you and are not doing anything wrong....once you know for sure...then kick them both to the curb...good luck.

I think what hurts the most is the fact that my ex KNEW! how much him not talking to me was bothering me...we've been very close friends for 19 years! since our first days in school...and she talks to him all the time now...and obviously hanging out with him.

And on his side...I had this issue before, with another friend of mine and I vented to him about it..this guy who took my wife out. My other buddy went out with my wife and my cousin to a club..and didnt ask me if i was cool with it. So when i was venting to this guy who recently took my wife out..i asked him if i was wrong to be a little pissed off? And he said NO! He told me that is extremly disrespectfull and that i have every right to be pissed off. And now he does this shit...sigh

It seem's like every week that i take a step forward...something always kicks me back..its getting old already=/

Typical. They are your friends because you have things in common - your wife is one of those things. This is not unusual.
Why don't you start taking some of her girl friends out..
See how she likes it....

your friend pick up a rebound and is useing her. stupid woman. High five if your friend lets you know what she up to so you can use the info against her in the divorce.
You are legally seperarted, right.

Ya I too kept comunication line open w my z when we where seprated and during our divorce and I used him for sex and I used his own words against him in court.
I recommend that you obtain a no contact order and quit sticking your nose in her personal life and gooly gee fill your thought w anything but ocd about her sorry butt.

Get legal sepration and let the dating begin. pertend like your conducting interviews w female,lol

Wow, that sucks.

I've written here before; I don't understand how anyone can be friends with their Ex. Just too much pain to have to deal with, IMO. It makes you seem like a good guy for being able to let bygones be bygones, but in reality, that's all bullshit. If it pains you to see her and talk to her, cut that shit off.

As for your "friend", I'd confront him about it in the most direct of ways. No real friend tries to pick up a buddies ex-wife.

Good Luck!

Oooooo, I kind of like what PF123 suggested.

say goodbye to the friend to, he is no friend. friends stick by you, i have had the same 2 friends for over 30 years. we were actually laughing because my ex husband sat with them and talked at my daughters wedding, both of them rolling their eyes at him. whatever. anyway, stop the contact, you can't be friends right now with someone who broke your heart. and one of your best friends is hanging out with her. thats not a friend. your right you need your true friends, and he is not one of them. true friends don't turn their backs on you. xoxoxoxoxox

sound like your in rejection mode and haven't worked thur that phases.

In death there is no rejection to deal with but in sepration and divorce 1 of 2 will half to deal w being rejected.

While married I had already went thur stages of prepaining for sepration and while seperated I pre paired for divorce. I had already went thur and worked thur difrent phases.
we were and remain and are still friends. we just couldnt live together and I wouldnt tolerate him being a professional womanizer.

My formor & his dates use to come over for cook outs and Iv even went on double dates w him and he still tells me about his dates etc.... No big deal. I had already worked thur phases. rejection is 1 of phases. we both had to deal w the rejection of ea other 0 again no big deal.

dam meebo DS unwanted thing auto sent the reply befor I finished writeing.
The dam thing frezzes my pc and when I try to scroll it strechs out what even on pg in box on screen and most of time I half to sign off to get unfrozen - compliments of the dam DS meebo thingy.

Anywho it is so common for seprated woman to turn to her mates male friends that she knows and you cant blame the guy for lending a sholder nor takeing butt that being flunted in his face.
True friends would not put thierselves into such a situration where theres even a remote possibilty of beding monkey ass.

I dismissed 1 of my dear friends for having accepting an invite from my x to be, to go out on my 40ft boat. I had tried for yrs to get her to go out on boat w me and w us, to no avail but the 2nd wk I was legally seprated her butt couldnt get on his lap aboard my boat fast enough. of course they both said that they hadnt plain it, it just happened.
Its amazeing how a penis can unzip pants zipper and make its way into woman pantys and they being having sex w/o either having thought about doing so. now thats a tricky dick.
I had been friends w my friend for 30ty yrs but she crossed the line when she accept my x invite to botty call. ya that's what that was, I dont care what they say. it was what it was.

I guess he felt like they had known ea other for yrs thur me and they had things in common thur me so they had sex aboard my boat. ya such is common but dam they didnt half to do so in my bed and use my towels and bed covers.

Its a shame I lost a good friend but I refuse to tolerate such crap and I dont wish to be reminded of such crap.

Sorry but your friend friendship is liken to that of convenant store cashier that you see on fairly reg bases.

Will buddy w therapest work thur rejection so you can move past the griveing process so that you can join the liveing.

get rid of them both!!

The same thing happened to me about 40 years ago. I dumped them both.

Even after 40 years I still think of them both. They married.

I lost two good friends and neither one has been or could be replaced. I am not sure I did the right thing. not forgiving them haunts me. I think I ended up hurting myself in the long run. I thought I was protecting myself at the time.

Godspeed.

Sorry to hear that. That is such a shitty feeling... loose both of them. At the end they won't have each other either. they don't sound to worthy of your energy...