Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
SPilgrim10
Why is it that when I feel like my life is getting in order, something finds a way to knock me back down?
Things were starting to come around for me. I was moving on. I have been going to meetups and meeting new people. I just got home from playing some Wallyball and I felt good because I was actually in shape to to not feel tired when I got home. And then I check my email and my realtor set a date for our house closing. Which means I'll have to see my ex after all (even though I asked to do this separately from her).
For those that don't know, short version: separated in Nov. 2010, she filed in December (she wanted this), finalized on Feb. 9 and I moved out that following weekend. I have not seen her since the end of January but we have talked a few times since then. But mostly NC as much as I can.
I specifically told the realtor that I didn't want to be there with her. I guess I'll talk to her tomorrow and see if I can change that. I should have that right. But if not, how do I do it? How do I talk to or see her again without breaking down or wanting to spill my heart out to her?
I know that is the final nail in the coffin. After this, we truly have no reason to see or talk to each other again (no kids either). While those are both positive things, it's not enough to make this OK for me. Because it's just that. That I will never get to talk to her again. I mean I could but I would want to talk to me wife, my friend. And all she will ever be now is my ex-wife. A stranger. She may miss me, but not in a loving way.
How do I do it. I know it's only 15-30 minutes of my life and then it will be over, but again, that's not enough. I know no one will have the answer for me. I just hate that feeling of dread. Of having to go and see everything slip through my fingers again. I want to ask her so many questions. I want to beg her to give us another chance. See how pathetic that is? I want to beg this girl that didn't love me to take me back. As if she somehow grew a heart in the time since we've been apart. But I feel like I'm having a relapse. I am struggling. Big time.
I don't know how to deal and it's a week away. Any input is appreciated, I mean it.
Things were starting to come around for me. I was moving on. I have been going to meetups and meeting new people. I just got home from playing some Wallyball and I felt good because I was actually in shape to to not feel tired when I got home. And then I check my email and my realtor set a date for our house closing. Which means I'll have to see my ex after all (even though I asked to do this separately from her).
For those that don't know, short version: separated in Nov. 2010, she filed in December (she wanted this), finalized on Feb. 9 and I moved out that following weekend. I have not seen her since the end of January but we have talked a few times since then. But mostly NC as much as I can.
I specifically told the realtor that I didn't want to be there with her. I guess I'll talk to her tomorrow and see if I can change that. I should have that right. But if not, how do I do it? How do I talk to or see her again without breaking down or wanting to spill my heart out to her?
I know that is the final nail in the coffin. After this, we truly have no reason to see or talk to each other again (no kids either). While those are both positive things, it's not enough to make this OK for me. Because it's just that. That I will never get to talk to her again. I mean I could but I would want to talk to me wife, my friend. And all she will ever be now is my ex-wife. A stranger. She may miss me, but not in a loving way.
How do I do it. I know it's only 15-30 minutes of my life and then it will be over, but again, that's not enough. I know no one will have the answer for me. I just hate that feeling of dread. Of having to go and see everything slip through my fingers again. I want to ask her so many questions. I want to beg her to give us another chance. See how pathetic that is? I want to beg this girl that didn't love me to take me back. As if she somehow grew a heart in the time since we've been apart. But I feel like I'm having a relapse. I am struggling. Big time.
I don't know how to deal and it's a week away. Any input is appreciated, I mean it.
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So stay true to you, but know, whatever you pour out to her, is probably not going to be met with a response you will want to hear. So sometimes, saying nothing, going through the motions and dealing with what comes after is what one has to do.
hang in there.