good article, thanks Elaine.
I still get upset when I still get upset when I think about all the people I have lost and it is hard for the new people I meet to understand but there is another part of me that thinks its exciting to get the chance to start again. I didn't really want it but I got it so might as well make the most of it.
i know most people who suffer a tbi change so much it is hard for people to understand and its not really their fault. It doesn't make them bad people. Its part of our recovery to understand this too.
Anyway here's to 2012 lets make it a good one

My Lord, I am so grateful to this writer, Sarah Wheaton at the New York Times. She totally gets it. I have to send her a fan letter.
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/01/10/h...
I was going to post this and then saw that you already had.
Thanks Elaine!

What an awesome aricle ElanieLanie! Seems to be right on for me and my family. Seems nobody likes to lose that independence. I know I sure didn't.
Very sad, but true!!
:(

The article really made me think about ways to help Larry without wounding his pride in anyway. I have been trying so hard to do this but I will try harder.

I myself have found that with my situation, it is that my husband wants what use to be, and that in turn makes me try to be that person. But, I'm just not that person anymore.

I think it definately is a two sided story and both parties have to be willing to work harder to reach a happy medium.

I am still with my spouse, but this is something we grapple with all the time.

I wish life with TBI were easier, it's just not!

Oh Eyes, that is so hard and it is such a struggle. I have begun to phrase things to Larry about our "new life". Like in our new life we dont have to please anyone but ourselves and in our new life we can do whatever we want to, and I will bring up things that are better in our New life. I am finding that it helps me too so I want to keep it up.
No more talking about how things used to be if I can.

Wild wonderful, building a new life that is relly going forward. I think we tend to mourn what was and over look whatwehave now.

Wildflower- I think that's just great how you are approaching this with your husband. I wish I had that kinda of support, rather always wanting me to be someone I am not anymore.
I think I still mourn my prior life and love. It's been 6 years for me, and I still want what I use to have. But, I know now that I will never have that again. It is best to move forward. Kudos to you for being aware and supportive along the way for your Larry.

This article really raised some thoughts I have always carried, but it seems no one knew to address at the time. I'm glad this has been addressed in some fashion. Maybe others will get better support with this in their recovery.

Thank you Sea and Norma for your kind comments. I did write Sarah Wheaton and got a nice reply.
Hi Ms. Oliver -

First, let me apologize for my slow response. I am normally involved
in our politics coverage, and so yesterday was a very hectic one due
to the New Hampshire primary.

Thank you for sharing a bit of your story with me. Though I've done
many interviews with couples on this subject, I can still only imagine
what you're going through. Still, I've seen so much bravery and
persistence among this group, and it sounds like you are no exception.

I knew that I was dealing with a very important and delicate story, so
I'm so glad to know that I managed to capture it in a way that rang
true for you.

All the best to you and your family.
Sarah