i still dont think ive found a way to deal with it...

the worst is when someone i think understands has to point out just how little these things are to "normal" people...

:(

yeah what I would give to be normal again. Our lives are so hard and it took the blink of a eye to happen. When people don't get it at times I want to scream what happened to me could happen to you too any time but i don't do that and I would never want it to happen to anyone else. There has to be a good day somewhere though thats all I feel like i am living for at times

You are right it happens in an instance! Your whole world is turned upside down. The world does keep marching, spinning, and running past us. I guess being like an inch worm in this race can seem so slow. But, you know what they say, the turtle still finishes the race first. Keep it all in perspective. You still have a long way to go yet. But, in the end you will be wiser for what you are learning.

I still feel like the world is passing me by, but I am getting better at keeping up the pace. It's a daily struggle, but I just have to keep my focus. I see the light at the end of this long tunnel I am passing thru. That's what keeps me going. So, I'm on to the next phase.

Keep up your battle!

I totally understand how you feel. It's so hard for me to keep friends bc they are so active (afterall I'm only24) so my closest friends are much older than I am. People my age are going out, getting married, having children. Although I do have a chld and struggle so hard to raise him alone I know I can't carry anymore and that in itself is a huge thing for me to accept. I can't learn all these new gadgets they are coming out with and I struggle these days just to keep up instead of getting better.

I just try not to think about it and just live my life in my little apartment with my son and the few others i've allowed to get close to me. I really dont have any words of encouragement here as I'm still, like you, trying to figure it out myself

xoxo,
Jessie

To be honest, my injury just happened not to long ago so I'm just starting to experience that, but I know what you mean, my friend Jen is in nursing school now, where I want to be and it kills me. I had to stop seeing her post all her accomplishments on all the great grades she's getting etc, I've been punching alot of pillows and crying alot of tears, its frustrating, I don't know how to deal with it to be honest, just know your not alone in it and it's ok to be sad, mad and yes pissed off...cause that's where even i get to. and I've never, ever been that way. I'm always the one to be happy for people..but now its like ..hey what about me?..so I feel your pain. Just know that you ARE succeeding in life, in your life, in our speed of life. We make accomplishments that only we can see, I take pride in my mini miracles each an every day but I also understand and give myself the time to grieve for the part of my life that I have lost too. It's only natural. But I know at some point, I will make new memories, and I know that we will all get back something, cause we'll all determined little buggers, you've already said how far you've come and how determined you are. So just imagined how much further you'll go in life! :)

I can say I've felt down on an occassion here and there, but I believe it was my denial when I was told what had happened...I straight up denied any of it to be true or that I would never be the same.

I was wrong...I learned with trial by fire that there were some problems I wasn't aware of at that time. One of those occassions hit home hard that first day! I allowed myself a few hours of wallowing in self pity and all the poor me I could take before I remembered telling the doctor...he was full of it. I began to rethink and come up with a game plan. I wrote it on a plain piece of paper...you are wrong...I will show you I can and will be better than ever. I started thinking of "how can I handle this situation again"

The doctor was right I had some problems and I'll give him that much but I will never give him....any more than that. I used the rest as a challange. I challanged myself to heal.

The doctor was right on something else as well...I would never be the same. I'll be better when I consider myself healed! Now, let me explain how.

Everything I have faced has been disabling. If I can't remember short term...how can I say or do anything I say I will?

Each and every problem I've faced I've worked on, found ways to reteach or retrain myself to do accurately and with ease. There are some physical things I can do nothing more than do the best I can and regain lost strength. Is that disabled? No...it's not only if I allow it to be. So what if I walk with a limp once in a while? Will that stop me from walking? No it will not...it will give me the idea of trying something else to help make that easier for me to do.

I also choose to look for the bright side in every situation I could let myself feel low and unhappy about. For instance that limp I mentioned. My bright side? At least I'm walking on it and if that's not enough...at least I still have my leg they wanted to take off!

Even if all the side effects from my TBI eventually go away (they haven't...yet) I will never be the same as I would have been before the accident. I have learned so much more than I would have if this had not happened to me. I've learned a great deal about what part of the brain controls what, that time can heal some if not all wounds and my favorite one...the brain can and will rewire itself different parts take up the slack a damaged part can no longer do. That...is fantastic!!! Knowledge is power!

I can help those who are injured after I was because of what I've learned along the way, just as many of you have helped me come up with a new way to get things done!!!

I've learned a great deal of how poorly disabled people are treated by many of my peers and I have a great deal to say to them when I see them do just that!!!! I can help change the way any of us are treated because of injuries we had no control over the end result...again...that is power!!!!

I could sit and feel sorry for myself and the things that I lost, but I'm much more content counting the things I didn't lose, the knowledge I have gained and the satisfaction of knowing I am winning...however long it takes to see any improvement. When you add it up from where you started at the begining of the injury...it is HUGE no matter how small it may seem to me it is much bigger to someone else who's watching from the sidelines or who saw me shortly after the accident.

Attitude is everything with TBI's. A good determined attitude will help you get where you so long to be!!

I am struggling with the same thing. My psychologist is working very hard with me, trying to readjust my expectations. Its not that I cant have lofty goals. She just wants me to celebrate my own accomplishments as if they were that big promotion. Celebrate the reading as a milestone as if I was a marathon runner. Because there is just as much work, if not more, into it.

There is a sign posted in the hall at the TBI clinic I attend. It reads: "Greater feats are achieved here in a single step than are achieved every four years at the Olympic Games."

Its time you celebrated all your amazing accomplishment more!

I'm thankful all I have is pain. But I hate the pain so much.
The tooth injury is playing off my headache, which I hate even more-
5 months of this, I think. And my hands hurt from minor accidents.

I'm used to the head pain, but the hands & tooth must heal, or I don't even want to think of the long haul. Thank God I don't need a root canal.

I may be in the odd situation where I need this headache to stop to get tooth nerve relief.

Must get funds to get accupuncture, chiro & even NCR.
Wish I could go to a TBI clinic-

Thanks for all the great responses. I was feeling a bit down this weekend, and the slowness of recovery got to me.

I have struggled with readjusting my expectactions/goals for years. My TBI happened in 2000. I had just applied to a Masters program in Social Work, of course that had to be postponed indefinatebly. And it turns out with my memory and cognitive issues I would never make it through graduate school, so that is one accomplishment gone. And eventually between the TBI and developing fibromyalgia had to stop working as a social worker and have been on disability since 2003, career, gone, no children, another thing gone. It is hard. And others do not neccessarily understand.
And many people do not know about my brain injury because it was awhile ago and I am not from around here, moved here for my husband (who is very supportive), so when I am tired or stressed and stuttur or slur or mess up my wording they think I am drunk or something....very frustrating....
Thanks for listening.....new to this group...Jen