and i see lots of people on here who let there b/f or g/f have fwb relationships aswell as there own and i cant do that. im so so so afraid of him cheating on me because he missed it. i need help i just am not sure what to do

I guess it depends on his he truly being honest with himself and you. Is he gay? Or bi? if bi, where on the kinsey scale does he lie.

My wife found out after a flawless 8 year relationship, and subsequently left me over it after being fine with it for four months. I feel she made a terrible mistake, as it was just one bump in our relationship. She said she "just wasn't dealing" with me being bi, and then told me she "loves me, but not in love with me". There's still questions over whether her new BF may have been involved, but I will never know.

I do enjoy that kind of porn, have been with men, but could never be with one romatically. I hear about 50% of these relationships survive.

The ones that do, I hear also are very good and happy. I'm hoping someday to find a woman who will love me regardless of my bisexuality, and enter into a completely committed relationship. Not sure if they exist.

while sometimes getting an idea of what another relationship does or does not do, you also have to remember, your relationship is yours. only you 2 can come up with a solution. and you have to come up with something that both of you can live with. let's say your husband is bi... perhaps looking up the things that he does, fulfills that part of him that he feels he is missing. i can't say for sure, as i'm not your husband. but i think maybe sitting down with him, having a mature talk, asking him what he wants (calmly, of course. getting mad, accusing him of something, is only likely to have him withdraw), and working around a solution that both of you can live with will help a lot. always keep the communication channel open. hope everything works out for you hun

Hmm...So sorry to hear of the lying--and I can imagine THAT'S the real reason for the tears and all the bad feelings. HUG But it sounds like you're fundamentally NOT ok with his bisexuality and you'll never make allowances for it (i.e. even him looking at the porn is not ok with you and him having a bf is DEF not ok)
If he had told you about his sexuality to begin with--if he hadn't continued to lie so long--no doubt you'd have been more accepting OR would have let him know earlier that its just not what you want or are compatible with.
There's no shame in that!
So you have to decide if this is the man you want to be with....

It doesn't sound like this is the man you want to be with to me. Good luck!

he really is i love him with all my heart, and he is good enough for me i dont feel the need to look up porn to satisfy myself, im bi aswell. though i have never truley been with a woman...i just cant understand why the woman he has a family with isnt enough

If you love him and want to stay with him, you're going to have to make at least one concession. If looking at gay porn is keeping him from hooking up with other guys, then is it really that bad? Sometimes in life we have to choose the lesser of two evils. I know that a lot of women feel hurt when their partner looks at porn, but they don't need to. For men, porn is impersonal, its entertainment, nothing more than the means to an end. That's why in our heart of hearts we really don't understand why women get so upset about it.I'm sure your guy is totally attracted to you, but unless you suddenly grow a penis there will always be something missing for him. It's understandable that your upset, but try not to worry about it.

kinsey scale? he doesnt need a scale to determine if he is bi or gay or str8. i have seen the kinsey scale think it is dumb you cant determine what you like based on a scale same way as saying someone must abide by an attractive scale it sounds silly.

anyway, have you asked him if he is "curious" about men?

Wow, does this sound familiar... with the exception you innocently happened upon the evidence... I had evidence emailed to me from my boyfriends online "friends", and finally gave up after his denials, and found out the truth. Truth is, as JC put it, porn is a means to an end. Our situations are a bit different, yet the same. Your fiance has a thing for gay porn, mine needs to actual conversation, and pictures from locals in our area. I felt like I wasn't good enough, since I basically do everything for him a gay guy can do, with the exception of not being a man. But porn is entertainment. Also, its a way to kind of live vicariously through that person, without actually committing the act. It helps people satisfy their curiosity, since as human beings, we're very prone to it. I'm not saying your wrong in how you feel- feelings are never wrong and are universal and individual at the same time. It will be a tough road, but you are good enough for him, if obviously he wants to marry you. but if you let it keep eating at you, it will only keep hurting you.

Also, it sounds like some personal self esteem problems. I had those same fears and I still have that, and to pick myself up, I get myself gorgeous from head to toe and strut my stuff... My boyfriend is never a fan of it, but it still lets him know that I know I'm desirable, and causes him to try and get my attention. Hope everything works out!

wow a 7 month old baby! and all this trama. Im so sorry to hear about the lying i know that hurts Hugs to you.

i would think about what you want from your relationship, and it's ok to NOT want a particular relationship

talk to him ... ask what he wants and will make him happy; then look at what you want and will make you happy

if what you both want doesn't mesh then moving on might be best for the three of you.

much better to go through the pain now then decades and a few children later

there is someone out there for everyone. as you will read on these blogs everyone is ok with different things. i wouldn't force yourself to be ok with his bi side, if that is not what you want in your man. there are women out there that are ok with their mans bi. (it seems i one of those ok with my h bi side) so your bf will find someone if you are not it. there is someone out there for you too, if he is not it for you.

i would be more concerned about his lack of honesty than his bi side. if he is in denial then you three with be living with the trama of him discovering himself only to possibly find out that he needs more guy than women and what that means to your relationship and family

if he doesn't know what he is or needs; how can you possibly know what he will end up wanting is what you can live with ... does that make sense to you?

I truly believe that there is someone out there that is 'right' for everyone. read these blogs and you will see that most people have different things they are ok with. so i would not make the decision to not get married just because of the bi; but i would if i felt he was lying and didn't know himself.

best of luch to you