What if God doesn't 'make this happen' or 'let that happen'?
Or what if He kept WORSE things from happening, but you just can't see those things!!!?

What if you are responsible for doing all you can to make your life what you want it to be, using what He gave you?

What if you look for the good things in your life instead of the bad?
(At least as much of the time as you spend on the 'bad'. Hopefully more time!)

It's hard not to ask questions that we have no way of knowing the answers to, sometimes.
Especially crappy stuff that we really could have done without.
But we really have more to gain if we focus on other things.

Would it make you happier if you went and drew a picture!!!?
I think having as much artistic talent as you do is a wonderful blessing!!!

I can't remember -- are you in therapy?
If you are, I hope you have a good therapist!!!
If you're not, I hope you look for one!!

This illness can be a real bitch and can make us feel really lousy sometimes.
But even aside from the BP, many of the things you 'why' about can be a real buzz kill unless you learn how to let them go.
And they are the kinds of things that can often be resolved in therapy.

I'm sorry you're feeling low right now.
I don't think this is what it's going to be like for your whole life.
I think much happiness can be yours.

Hang in there, kiddo.

(((((Hugs)))))

I'm sorry you're hurting. We have power of our own and intelligence and intuition to avoid letting people who hurt us into our lives and avoid allowing people to do it. Wishing you the best.

are our voices perhaps too quiet? a friend of mine said my voice is too quiet to be heard in my family. maybe our voices are too quiet to be heard by 'god' or the 'universe' or whatever you choose to believe in.

Knowing that none of it was your own fault may be most helpful.

Eulenspiegel made a good point, I think...what if He kept WORSE things from happening?

Also, when you get into some Christian line of thinking, at least with what I've been taught along the way, God gave us free will, which sucks in a lot of ways because we do have choices to make, they are ours, but it also allows people to be vile, cruel, horrendous people. I find that line of thinking extremely difficult. I'm not saying that's what ALL Christians think/believe, just saying that's what I was taught.

Sometimes that helps me.

Most of the time, I'm pissed off with God. I pray, I talk to Him about it, I figure already knows I'm pissed, so I just talk with Him and then try to carry on and let some stuff go when I can.

It's obvious you are hurting, and I'm sorry about that. Hope things get better.

Honey, i am sorry you r hurting.

(((Hugs))) Babe!

Those Ar$eholes will get their punishment in the next life!

I had to recognize, accept, and forgive those things that happened in my past and LEAVE them in my past. There are no answers for why in many cases. Even if there were it would not change the fact that they happened. Taking what we have experienced and using it to make us stronger, using it to help others, using it to motivate us to be better, will empower us. As long as you hang on to the past, you allow it to have power over you along with all those who hurt you.

I am sorry you are hurting, but it should only be a "process" not a lifestyle. xo

I wish for your life to get better and I am sorry that these things happen to you.

Thank you all for the wonderful support .

Uh what if he kept worse things from happening?

yeah that doesn't fly with me. That's no excuse to let anything bad happen at all period.

Ever wonder why god's plan seems like there is no plan? Maybe that's because there is no god.

Just saying.

I agree with Eulenspiegel, her statement was brilliant.

I have a theory, mind you it's my own theory and it could sound stupid.
But, I believe our life is sort of like a job interview. When we're done, because of what we went through, we will be able to go to a higher level and use our experience in a helpful way. (told you it sounded stupid). I firmly believe this and it's what keeps me going on and learning from the bad stuff that happens in my life.

I don't blame the sexual, mental and physical abuse on anyone but the sadists who inflicted it me. Unfortunately most of my abuse was at the hands of those I needed to love me the most and it has taken me years to learn to lay the blame at their feet and stop blaming myself for what they did to me.

I have come to realize there are just evil people in this world who have no conscious and just derive pleasure and some kind off sick fulfillment from hurting people especially those close to them.

Try to remain strong and be gentle with yourself.

Favorite line from a movie "the bad stuff is easier to remember". I just think we aren't evolved enough to understand it. Our brains can't comprehend...like time and relativity...infinite possibilities. The worse thing for me is fighting the cynicism. And the why's like you said without completely destroying my current reality (whatever that means). I don't know either. Good post.

odd that a supposed `god of love' would allow any of this to happen to any child anywhere.

hmmmmmmmmmmmm.

i'm sure you know what i'm going to say next.