Story time! Gather 'round the magic story time carpet, y'all.

The TooLong;Didn'tRead of it is;
1) Here's a story about an encounter I had with a rude person
2) My mental illness makes it as such that I cannot tolerate rude people. However.... you can't always avoid them. And in this case, I cannot.
3)So what do I do?

But if you still want the story.

I was at school yesterday in the student center because I have almost 2 hours in between classes to do homework, but since there's not much yet I use it mainly to chill, and charge my laptop.

I went in yesterday, I had to sit by the tv to use the "cube" to charge my laptop, so I couldn't avoid the anime nerds.

The nerds at my school are for the majority fucking mean and hurtful and seem very socially "off". Some refuse to talk to you if you're not already in the "group". You walk into the room and their eyes don't deviate away from the screen or tv of whatever anime/movie/video game they're preoccupied with. It's really creepy, they look like zombies.

This is so common to con-goers and anime fans that there's even a term for it, "weeaboo". And some of these people fit the shoe pretty well.... (although there are one or two cute dykes)

Anyway...

Yesterday I had to go sit by the tv to charge my laptop. This redhead girl was sitting there, she wouldn't even look at me, not even a glance. Kind of weird. But I understand how hardcore nerd the particular group of otakus at my school are, and that other people dislike them for the same reason I do.

I was on my laptop and there was some Marvel movie on, I think of the Iron Man series (because Iron Man was the only character I recognized, although I realize there are Marvel movies with more than one popular character). ANYWAY I hear this redhead girl who wouldn't glance my way SCREAM at this skinny black guy "THERE ARE OTHER PEOPLE TALKING OVER THERE TOO!!!!!! GO OVER THERE!!!!" I guess he said something about her obnoxiously giggling and obnoxiously making comments at/about the movie, because he must've said it so quietly that I didn't even hear him.

I thought about saying something to her about being a bitch to that kid, but didn't. I took my anxiety pills because I have very bad anxiety and one of my triggers is being around people who are both socially unaware AND mean.

I can deal with some social obliviousness by itself, because a lot of my friends have a minor degree of it, and I do, myself. But people who are extremely socially unaware, and snap at people when they're called on it, make me very uncomfortable.

Honestly I think maybe she's autistic or something, because her degree of being socially awkward is pretty high, she's extremely unfriendly and callously defensive. I'm not saying all autistic people are this way, because it's not true. But she just had this vibe Idk. Something human and relatable about her was amiss, and it made her unapproachable. She doesn't really seem to care about hurting peoples' feelings. But in the instance of her being actually socially impaired due to a condition, I couldn't justify bitching at her.

(if that^ was ignorant or not fitting of autism btw, PLEASE don't hesitate to correct me or let me know. Thanks.)

However.... if she comes for me... See, I don't want that to happen. But I'd be out for blood. I can't though! My family needs "assistance" from my loans (which I'll eventually end up paying back anyway, so who cares), so I absolutely must attend school and do well this semester. I can't get kicked out for fighting or any such thing.

But I can't control myself when I'm triggered so strongly.... I get a strong rush of adrenaline and can't calm myself down on the spot, or until hours afterwards.

What should I do???? Physical violence is wrong, and my black and white thinking would cause me to feel extremely remorseful later on for it. Plus right or wrong, it'd probably get me kicked out, and I won't be able to go back to school, or help my family out.

But once I'm triggered I can't calm down even with anxiety aids until much later on, and I can't avoid her forever. The Student Centre is everyone's to use, and I'm going to have to probably sit there and charge my laptop often this semester.

I can't like have an intelligent conversation with her so we can sort out our differences, because it's very clear to me that she's lacking in either social skills or caring about other people, or both.

Should I say something to an academic advisor/staff????? I hate to "rat" but my options are kinda limited, and this needs to be handled maturely and civilly. It's not her fucking house.

/end rant